Breaking Silence
by Cat1922
Summary: Do you know whats really annoying?"She didn't answer. "I've told you more then anyone in a long time and I dont even know your name!" she would have told him if he hadn't looked like he would bite her head off. "Well what is it?" "Sophie." full sum inside
1. Chapter One

Breaking Silence

In true Cat style, we will begin this summary!

Enter Our Reserved Hero!

Remus was just tired. Tired of everything! Of his and Gwen's fighting over nothing at all. Tired of putting on a brave calm face for his friends when that was far from the truth. Tired of seeing this girl randomly saying more to her then he's every said to anyone else then leaving and feeling like it's all a dream that he keeps waking up too. He just wants to keep dreaming.

Enter Our Heroine

Sophie Naldeg is much the same as our hero she's tired of the silence that she endures tired of the lies she sends home. She tired of charm homework she just does not get. Tired of not having anyone to ask for help. She's tired of desperately trying to be the perfect daughter even though her family carries a secret about her that will stop that from ever happening.

Enter The Room of Requirements

This may be the scene of a crime for the death of charms if the students have any say about it! In this story of family, love, trust, silence and the breaking of it.

Chapter One

A young girl, women rather walked up one of the many moving stair cases trying not to walk into anything solid. "I ghost would almost be welcomed by now." She said aloud to no one in particular except maybe herself. "At least the cold rush would wake me up.," she thought sleepily. She shook her long hair out of her face. The smoky black curls always seemed to be getting in her face and her eyes especially, annoyance shown in their cloudy depths. "I really should just cut them off." She said aloud again to herself. She knew she wouldn't though. There the only feature that she and her estranged family had in common. Her mother, her two sisters, and herself, all shared curly black hair. Her father, to her continued dismay, did not look a thing like her, or act like her. Unless they were introduced together with their last names, no one would believe they were related. So bitterly, she would keep them as her vain, desperate attempt to fit into the Naldeg family.

She sighed and jumped the last trick stair that comes right before the Ravensclaw common room's floor. Her legs were screaming in protest from the weight of books in her arms. She was coming from the library having gotten a head start on getting books that interested her. It was the first of September and she had opted out of going to the sorting ceremony and start of the year feast. She didn't have anyone to catch up with so she just ate on the train, then left discretely to her true home, and love the library. Her and the head librarian had an understanding, she wouldn't make a mess and always put her books back and ones she found laying around, and she would turn a blind eye to the girls Sophie's constant presence before during and after hours. Sophie felt the only reason she truly was getting away with this was that the librarian felt Sophie was a kindred spirit.

Making her way to the painting that housed the common rooms door, she said the password and looked inside. For being the "Intellectual" house, Ravensclaw's partied just was much as Gryffindor were rumored to. Not wanting to deal with the noise Sophie walked quickly to store the books she had gotten onto her bed and drew the curtains. Having completed that she turned around went right back down into the corridor. "Looks like I'll be visiting my favorite room sooner than I though I would be." She said to herself again. She paused for a moment considering something then continued down to the stair well. "I really must stop talking to myself, its going to make me look even crazier than I really am." The trip to the corridor that held the Room of Requirements was quick and one her legs knew well. It had come to the point that she made the trip without any thought needed. Reaching her destination, she started to pace and think.

She was trying to think about what she had dubbed her room but other thoughts kept creeping into her mind. She wanted was her room so she could collapse read for a little while then go to sleep. After seeing the party and all the happy expressions from her fellow house mates, she wasn't sure if it was what she really needed. For the past six years, she had kept to herself fighting too many internal battles to care or have the strength for having to go out of her comfort zone and talk with other people. Remembering the happy faces, she thought for a moment that she might actually go back and socialize but after six years, she felt it to be too late to start socializing now.

Despite her distracted thinking the door appeared quick enough. With a contented sigh, Sophie walked into her room. "I'm home." She announced looking around. It was just as she left it on the last day of school last year.

A spacious room, kind of like a loft, the front portion was taken up by large comfy chairs, arm chairs made of soft supple leather, large bean filled cushions, relining chairs, a vast assortment for when she got tired of one she could move on to another. An old fashion writing desk was at the right side of the vast room on a wall with a window that showed the Forbidden Forest as well as the Whomping willow. The only reason she knew that this was a false window was that the weather matched what ever mood she was in. once when she had been particularly upset, the room created a balcony for her relax on.

The room was styled in deep midnight blues and rich plumbs with emerald greens, all her favorite. She was constantly wondering why the Room was so good to her; she didn't deserve it that was for sure.

Walking over to the writing desk, she looked to inspect and see if anything had changed. "You got me a present?" she asked the Room. On the desk was a quill, a pot of open ink, a scroll of parchment, and a folded up piece of parchment. On it in simple script was _Write to me_.

"Wonderful. Now the Room wanted me to write to it." She muttered to herself. She thought of all the things in the past it had done for her and it made her pause and think how much she kinda owed the Room. In a time were she could or would talk to no one it had offered a haven of sorts. In a way it had been her family for these past six years, as sad as that sounded. So she sat down on a whim and decided to write, at least she could kill time until most of the partying was over.

_Hello I guess, _

_I'm not sure who you are, or for that matter, what you are, but I figured there was no reason not to try this anyways. I'm not sure really what to say. I'm not even sure if anyone/thing is going to answer. _

_Yours skeptically _

_A Lady_

_P.S I'm only doing this to appease a room. Does this make me crazy?_

She grinned. Even thought the whole letter didn't really make any sense, she signed it the same as her favorite author, Jane Austen. While she had been writing, sealing wax and a candle had appeared thanks to the wonders of her favorite room. Using what had been left for her, she simply left the letter on the desk.

Looking at the clock that was always present when she needed it, she decided to make her way up to bed. With eyes half closed, she managed to make it back up to her room, change, and fall into bed well before anyone else.

The wake up bell wrung way too early for Sophie the next morning. She mentally groaned and stood stretching, trying to work the sleep from her system. Going through the motions of the morning, she thought ahead to her first day of class's. Potions was shaping to be the worst, she was going to be in an advanced potions class, farther ahead than anyone her age, this class was also filled with people in Slytherin, actually solely Slytherin.

Sophie was so deep in her thoughts she didn't look up when the owls came in with the morning mail. In fact it wasn't until a very irritated horned owl stared pecking her that she paid anything any attention. A group of girls, one was Gwen who sleeps in her dorm, stared giggling, openly laughing at her. Sophie felt color rising in to her cheeks as she untied the message from irate owl's leg. She fed the owl her remaining toast as an apology and ripped open the letter.

_Hello Lady, _

_Your letter made about as much sense as it could considering the situation. I'm assuming something as random as instructions sitting on a desk in the Room of Requirements happened to you, which is at least how I came a cross your letter. I do hope you get this letter in return, I am rather curious about someone who would write a letter to appease a room. Though I'm not sure yet if you are crazy or not, I think the better question would be who's crazier, the person writing a letter to appease a room or the person writing back to the person appeasing the room. I shall be waiting impatiently for your reply_

_Yours expectantly_

_A Gentleman_

She just looked at the piece of parchment with a smile on her face. This could get interesting!

A/N: MY IMFAMIOUS AUTHORS NOTES HAVE RETURNED! Some people who are set to get alerts to read this might have noticed something…… theres still just one chapter……. But its not the same…… what the hell? Yes yes yes I changed the chapter…… I felt having her live in the room of requirements was just getting into the mary sue realm just a tad to much….. and I have a better plot with her in the dorm room…… what I am flirting dangerously is lupins personality this is like close to the dark side of lupin….. when you know lupin shows up in person you might see more of my foray into the almost realm of oocness….. on a slightly related note MY GRAMMER AND SPELLING HAS IMPROVED!!!!!! And really that's because I'm making my poor spell check check everything and I do mean EVERYTHING!!!!! And I am STILL in the market for a Beta though cause lets face it…. This is probably still riddled with mistakes… and I'm impatient and cant do it myself…… SO anyways I shall finish this on two notes! One please read my other fic healing deep wounds just for the sake that chrarters will cross over between the two fics and storylines will cross. And lastly I'm throwing a shout out to my wonderful friend schlemeca whos name I cant spell(she's becca to me) but anyways if you like James lilly Lupin Oc(your reading one currently btw) or Sirius oc check out her fic Marauders angels! Also my sis is writing a yaoi kingdom hearts story you might want to check out if your into that sort of thing….. her pen name is Brightsin(some number) and the fic is Past life! Anyways I'm done JANE!!!! Okay if anything in the authors notes doesn't make sense its cause I was checking my readability stats and I had to go through spell check and it could have changed things I didn't want it to but anyways BYE! Oh I wish to brag for one second my sis (brightsin(some numbers) bought me a Sesshi!!! Plushie for my sixteenth b day I'm just saying I have the best sister in the world! Now I'm leaving! JANE*runs away with her wonderful Sesshi plushie*


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

_Dear Gentleman,_

_I assure you I am very much sane. Well, most of the time. The only time I tend to lose a grip on my control would be during Charms homework. I am not sold on your sanity, especially if you continue to write to me. I still vainly hope you will, talking to an insane man is better than talking to a brick wall or thin air as I frequently do. I can not help but find myself wondering why you would be writing to me. Your letters sound intelligent enough so you must have some friends. Or why you were in the Room of Requirements? Not many people know of that particular room. _

_Yours curiously _

_A Lady_

_Dear Lady,_

_Well I assure you, you were correct in your assessment of my insanity, I should be locked up! I do not share your same affliction with Charms though Potions does escape me. As to why I was in the Room of Requirements, well it's rather complicated. The reality would be I was running away from Flitch after playing a prank with my friends. We split up and tried to find places to hide and the Room opened up to me. All that was in it was a desk, your letter, and a piece of paper saying _Write Back_. What were you doing in the Room that evening? Also, I thought I would finally sign with my real name. _

_Yours not so anonymously _

_Remus Lupin_

_P.S. If you stop writing to me because of whom I am, just be warned that I will keep sending you letters anyways. _

"Miss Naldeg, what is the answer?" Sophie looked up at her teacher a little dumb struck.

"Um, what was the question Professor?" she looked sheepishly at her potions professor.

"That's what I thought Miss Naldeg. Please in the future pay more attention to the lesson. Now Miss Ross, what is the answer that your lab partner felt she was above?" Sophie didn't hear the answer; she was once again too focused on the letter she was reading. Remus Lupin that was the last person she thought she was writing to. All she could think was that he's best friends with Sirius Black, not necessarily a good thing in her mind. Her father is good friends with Sirius's father; both had a shared devotion for the Dark Lord. Which was another thing that separated her from her family; she didn't care what combination of blood ran through your veins. She didn't know for sure, if he shared his family's views. From talk that surrounded him, she did not believe so. But that did not prove what his opinion of her would be at the mention of her last name.

"Miss Naldeg, why don't you try this question?" she looked up at her Professor again thinking of just how much homework she was going to get for this mess up. Shaking her head, she awaited her punishment. "As I thought, I want a seven inch long essay on mushrooms on my desk tomorrow and anymore offenses and you will have detention as well as a thirty inch report on peppermint leaves." Sophie deiced after that threat she should pay attention.

The rest of class passed quickly, which was a very good thing in Sophie's eyes, considering the fact that she was completely distracted. Collecting her books, she left skipping her lunch to go to the library instead. She wanted time to think, without going to the Room, too many people would be around that could possibly see, she didn't want to chance it. Walking through the large double doors, she breathed in the familiar scent of musty old book, and still air. Not going anywhere in particular, she started to wander around the library thinking of a response to Lupin's letter. Sophie decided to respond, he was fun to talk to, and it was nice just to talk to someone, something that she admittedly didn't do often. Passing along through the many aisles, she heard hushed voices talking very hurriedly and rather angrily.

"What do you want me to do Gwen?" Sophie missed a step at the mention of her dorm mate's name. Curiosity got the best of her and she sneaked a peek through the crack that existed between the shelves of books and looked to see who was talking to Gwen.

"It's what you should do Remus, I'm your girlfriend for crying out loud! Why are you talking to another woman?" It felt like ice water had been poured down her back. She kept listening, worried now where this was going.

"It's not like I'm cheating on you Gwen." He sounded tired, as if they had had this argument before and already knew the outcome. She looked again, trying to change her line of sight. She had never actually seen Remus Lupin before. She had heard of him, considering the fact that he's part of the infamous Marauder gang. Sadly, the only thing she could actually see was Gwen. She didn't need to see Gwen to remember what she looked like; she has been living with her for six years. Tall, taller than herself by about an inch, trim, blonde, with standard blue eyes. She has had a rash of boyfriends since fifth year; Sophie had gotten to hear about everyone of them. Beautiful she maybe, but she was whiny, a little shallow in her views, and actions. She would talk openly to another one of their room mates about her every action. "She's a friend, and we just exchange letters, I don't even know who she is! I can't cheat on you with someone when I don't even know their name! Actually Gwen, I'm offended that you think that I'm the type of person to cheat at all!" his voice was calm but with steel threaded through it, he had his calm now but it sounded like it wasn't going to hold out much longer.

"You know my history, it just worries me, and I don't want you to leave me." Sophie could hear the pout in her voice. Desperately, Sophie tried to hold in a laugh. From Gwen's nightly chats it was clear, if anyone has cheated in any of Gwen's relationships it had been her. Her first boyfriend, or second boyfriend, probably didn't know, but there was a two month span that they had been dating her at the same time.

"Gwen, do you trust me?" his voice sounded weary.

"Of course Remus." Still watching the exchange, Sophie watched Gwen move out of the line of sight Sophie could see in the slight crack that was her visibility. She was probably moving into Remus's arms, or trying to.

"Then why do we have this argument every time I even look at another girl no matter how innocent?" before Gwen could attempt to answer him another person caught Gwen's attention.

"Gwen, Transfiguration Professor wants to see you about a paper." Some young girl's voice told her. Sophie didn't wait for an answer she started back tracking knowing the interesting part would be over by now.

She made a few turns, picked up a random book from the shelves and went to find a table to spend the rest of lunch at. Because luck had never been one of her best qualities, the table she choose to sit at was of course occupied by someone when she desperately wanted to be alone and write to Lupin. She had never seen him before, his legs were long and lightly gawky, his head was in his hands, sandy blonde hair, hovering somewhere between tarnished gold and a tannish color.

She stopped suddenly going trying to turn around and go back but as was her luck, she dropped the heavy tome onto the floor with a loud thud. She couldn't see the man, her back was to him but she knew his head would have snapped up at her dropping the book.

"Oh I'm sorry you can sit here." For the second time today, it felt like cold water was running down her back. She had heard that voice for the first time today but she wasn't sure she would ever forget it. It was warm, with a slight musical quality that she was sure someone would call her crazy for ever admitting. At the same time, she could hear a sadness in his voice; she wasn't sure why she heard it just she knew it was there.

With out turning around she answered him trying to keep the blush from her face and voice. "No that's fine I can go some place else." Bending down to pick up the forsaken book that she had dropped, Sophie almost dropped it again after noticing the title, _Bells and whistles, Charm spells that will get you noticed!_

"No really come sit down, I don't bite, I promise." Turning around, she noticed the wolfish smile that played across his face. She also noticed it didn't reach his eyes. Walking as if a rabbit caught in wolfs gaze, Sophie edged her way around the table before sitting as far away from him as possible. Realizing she couldn't just take out parchment and start working on her letter to Remus with him sitting this close to her, she took the only other option open to her. She opened the dreaded charms book and started reading a random page.

_In this chapter, we shall learn about charms to cut your hair with!_

Great, she thought not only had the book ruined her escape plan but it didn't even have a spell she could use. Charms, why was it always _charms. _She turned to another page about makeup or something of that sort and stared at the same sentence for the next five minutes.

"You know what I really hate?" Sophie looked up at him, taking note that he wasn't looking at her. Remus was currently looking away at some random point in the air. Sophie didn't attempt to answer, she had a feeling that she wasn't suppose to. Her suspicions were proven correct when he continued a breath later. "Lying, dishonesty, half truths. I can't stand them! But for some reason or another, my life seems to be full of them and there is no conceivable plan to eliminate them!" he was supremely frustrated. At this last statement, he was up and out of his chair, running an agitated hand through already mussed hair, exposing his eyes to her. They fascinated her; at first glance, they seemed a mellow green, closer inspection would show the golden flecks that worked their way though them. She took a shaky breath and tried to help as best she could.

"Well you do what you can. That's all you can really do. You take care of what you can and deal with what you can't. It's frustrating I know" she considered her own family life. "In some situations, that's all you can really do." The bell rung for lunch to end and classes to begin again, neither of them made a move to leave.

"Thank you?" he looked at her expectedly.

"Sophie Naldeg."

"Sophie." He smiled. "You right. You know something though? In the span of the last five minutes, I have told you something that has been plaguing me for longer than I can remember, and you're the first person I've actually gotten up the nerve to tell." He stared at her as if she was some new contraption that he had never seen before. It was rather confusing and refreshing to him at the same time.

"No offense, but I don't think that's something that you should be proud of." she smiled at him sheepishly. He laughed, which only made her smile more.

"No, I guess not. At least this means I wasn't lying to a girl about my sanity earlier." It registered in her mind that he was talking about her, well _A Lady_, which freaked her out slightly. The late bell took that moment to ring. "Well it has been very nice to talk to you Sophie, I do hope we get another chance to talk and I promise to be more civil." Standing up suddenly he waved and left. Sophie was left a little rattled not sure what to make of her encounter with Lupin. She deiced that she had enjoyed it, as harried as it was. If Lupin wanted someone to talk to that, he didn't have to hide things from, that wouldn't hide things from him, she would give it to him. Packing up her stuff, she thought of just how late she was going to be to be to her second half of potions. (Because she was in advanced potions it was a double block class one before lunch and one after lunch).

"Hullo." A voice called from behind her. She turned around and faced the man. A sixth year like herself, his name was Joseph, also a Ravensclaw. Roughly her height taller maybe by an inch and an half, his hair was a darker brown shade with eyes to match, recently he had been hanging around Gwen bragging about his statues as team captain. "I see you were talking to Remus Lupin." He walked slyly over toward her.

"Yes, he's a nice guy." Sophie just kept packing up her things, hoping not to have this go in a sour direction.

"I've heard he might be cheating on his girl friend. Think of what a shame it would be if, you know, if she found out it was you huh?" She turned and faced him.

"What do you want?" she said coldly, mimicking the tone her father would take when he spoke to her on a rare occasion.

"I was just thinking on how much it would hurt poor Gwen if she ever found out her boyfriend was cheating on her? Especially to someone like you." She ignored the jab, she had heard worse. What she didn't understand was his motives. If he liked Gwen, wouldn't it be in his favor to have Gwen know about her and Lupin's supposed relationship?

"I think you have gravely misunderstood the situation. This was the first time I have ever seen Remus Lupin."

"I'm just saying. If anything would happen that upsets my Gwen then I won't be held responsible for my actions." He took his leave after that last confusing comment. She shook her head not knowing what to make of the situation.

"Maybe he's touched in the brain?" she said to no one at all. Hurrying now she rushed to potions where she started to draft her letter in response to Remus, her encounter with Joseph had changed nothing for her. She wasn't going to give Remus her name in the first place hoping not to complicate things if she could help it, him knowing her name would complicate it. She was finished by dinner having had to stop and work on it in charms because of her potions professor.

_Dear Master Lupin,_

_I am honored to know I have the pleasure to talk to one of the Marauders! I know you are probably expecting my name in return, but I fear that our little interludes would lose some of there appeal without my anonymity. I have of course not made this decision lightly, I agonized over it all through potions, thanks to you I now have a thirty inch essay due on peppermint leave of which I assure you I have no idea how I will complete, as well was a fifteen inch essay on the history of the most obscure charms master ever Master Will Crefisore. Whom of which I know nothing about and I know I shall not finish, considering both are due tomorrow. But I shall assure you that I shall continue to write to you, and badger you with constant letters if you refuse to respond to me. Right now, what I shall do is issue you a challenge. I'm guessing that the news of my withholding my name will not settle well with you, so I'm going to let you guess! I shall answer all of your questions within reason, as long as you answer mine. Such as, tell me of your friends? I find myself highly curious about them, and the reason you would write to me instead of talking to them. I also wonder what your friends think of me, have you even told them of me? Well till next time._

_Yours Mischievously_

_A Lady_

She sent the letter off before dinner. She got a strange thrill when she saw the owl carrying her letter swoop down on the Gryffindor house table knowing whom it went to. She went to sleep that night well passed midnight having finished her potions essay and not her charms. She just accepted that she was going to have to take her punishment. But she went to sleep in good spirits anyways.

The morning came and she worked her way to the breakfast table sitting down in a daze not really awake yet having not recovered yet from her long night. The morning post came in halfway though breakfast as it always did and a letter came to her as she hoped, it was heavier than normal with one roll of parchment and one actually sealed letter.She unrolled the parchment first before reading the letter. Reading the intro written in bold graceful script that marked it as Lupin's

_Getting an accurate history of Will…._

Sophie gaped at it; it was a fifteen inch essay on that forsaken Charms master that she had not written. She quickly tore open the letter and read.

_Dear Lady,_

_You are rather vexing you know? Well maybe it's been the day I've been having. You letter did make me smile at parts and I thank you for that, I sourly needed a smile yesterday. I am so sorry that because of your correspondences with me, you gained more work than you could manage. Though in truth it is your fault not mine. Anyways you should now be in possession of the charms essay you weren't going to write, you're on your own for potions. Your added payment for the essay shall be a short letter thanks to the fact you have now doubled my work load! That and just to make sure, tell me of your friends first, then I shall regale you with the tales of my most defiantly insane family. _

_Yours Frustratedly _

_Remus Lupin _

A/N: you lucky people you! Its been what a week since my last post? And already another chapter? It was a long one too!!!! I'm going to end up spoiling you! Lets see important information first! Lets see Remus has been taken over by me and because its been so long since I have read the third book I do not remember his eye color so I'm making it up as I go along… that and other things as well this was never marked as cannon so *sticks out tongue* Anyways… Ah healing deep wounds people I am sorry to say but say good bye to healing deep wounds it is officially dead right now…..*Evie runs and hides* Evie even if I wasn't just rewriting it your in this fanfic as well as the major player in my rp with Zorro so calm down! Yes I talk to my characters! .Sohpie: she does! Ummies Ah yes thank you my reviews all of you…. Oh and Micati I warn you now don't read healing deep wounds till I start fixing it if you like grammar youll hate that story its horrible…. I actually try with this oneXD which is why Healing Deep Wounds is getting re worked! Oh and lastly Jedigal95 YOU OWE ME A COOKIE!!!!!!!!!! Yes I do read my reviews(a few times a day sometimes) and if you review you normally get mentioned because I love you all!*hugs all reviewers!* and anyone that sets me to their alearts they make me very very very happy as well! Welll till next time JANE!


	3. Chapter 3

_Dear Remus, _

_I can't thank you enough for the essay, you just saved my G.P.A and none existent social life. Truly, I am grateful. Oh and nice try by the way, trying to figure out who I was by who my friends are, how about we compromise and I'll tell you about my family. I have three sisters Malinda(26) Karen(25) and Tess(10).My parents have been together for going on thirty years now. Like many marriages from my family, theirs was an arranged marriage, and a very loveless marriage at that. I have a pretty estranged relationship from all of my family except my little sister. I probably wouldn't go home if it weren't for little Tessie. No one would really miss me besides her. She is the sweetest little thing, she's small for her age, very different from myself, she takes after the rest of the family with her mousy brown hair and cornflower blue eyes. She is a sweetheart though and I love her more than anyone or anything else in the world. So moving on from me, please tell me about your family? I would love to get off the topic of mine._

_Your exhaustedly_

_A Lady_

_P.S. I also was wondering about the argument you had with you girlfriend today, I cant recall her name, I don't believe I know it. Yes I was eavesdropping but I didn't catch the end and am interested about it. I wont ask you to tell me everything about your relationship though I would ask if you will keep writing me? Though that would be answered if I get a reply from this. _

Sophie was aware on how bold it was for her to mention Gwen, especially when she met Remus that day. She was hoping desperately for her usual talent of being forgettable would help her out. After their meeting though, she was conflicted with her feelings. A part of her, and she didn't know how big, wanted Remus to figure out who she was. She sighed and tried not to analyze herself any further afraid of what she might find. Sealing the letter, she left the library table she had commandeered for while doing all of her homework and then to write Remus's letter.

The trip to the Owlry was a brief trip that she was thankful for, it was close to three and she had yet to sleep. She had gotten the crazy idea into her head to do all of her homework now and leave the rest of her weekend open for herself. That had ended with four hours of homework and another hour spent writing back to Remus. She was surprised it hadn't taken her long with how worried about what she should say, it had slowed her down considerably. She was done though and with the new books she had found paired with the crisp autumn weather, she had every intention of enjoying her weekend to the fullest.

Opening the wooden owlry door Sophie stepped in the now familiar tower room. The large octagonal room was filled with feathers and owl droppings and the smell of them. Ignoring those characteristics, and the massive numbers of owls, the room was rather amazing. Its high ceiling broken up only by rafters converted into owl perches, the tall glassless windows letting in a constant breeze that was very refreshing, if a bit cold from the crisp night air.

Walking to the center of the room she beckoned to her new friend, a fantastic barn owl of almost regal stature. Sophie didn't own an owl personally; her father wouldn't allow her to have anything as opulent as that. The most expensive thing that she owned would be her wand. A gorgeous willow wand sixteen inches with unicorn hair core. It wasn't an expensive wand, she actually found it while she was in the library in her home tucked hidden behind some very old books. She wouldn't even be going to Hogwarts if it weren't for the fact that Hogwarts was so persistent about her attending.

"Hello there darling! I have a letter for you to deliver tomorrow." Duchess as Sophie had taken to calling her looked at her with contempt in her eyes, hooted and flew down to meet her. "Did I wake you up Duchess? I'm sorry, but I had to finish my homework before I wrote the letter and well I brought you a treat?" Sophie said with a sheepish shrug. Some people would look at her weird if they saw her talking to an owl as such. She would challenge them to have Duchess turned her powerful stare on you and see if you don't bow or curtsy to her and ask forgiveness for what ever you may have done. Being reminded of the groveling that _she_ should be doing at the moment, she held out her hand filled with Duchess's favorite owl treats while making sure her arm was covered enough so that Duchess's talons wouldn't dig into her skin. Duchess was normally very careful not to grip any harder than what she needed to stay perched on Sophie's arm. "Here you go you needy thing." Duchess picked at her treats. "There now are you happy with me Your Grace?" she cooed softly and continued to eat from Sophie's palm. Skillfully Sophie slipped her letter into onto Duchess's leg with one hand having done this before. After finishing the treats, Duchess turned and looked at Sophie expectantly. "What? Now you like me again Your Grace?" Sophie smiled and rubbed Duchess's head affectionately. "Why do I…" Sophie never finished that sentence do to the door being thrown open causing Duchess to screech and dig her claws into Sophie's barely protected arm causing her to cry out in pain herself. Duchess took off flying high into rafters. Sophie fell to her knees, trying to breathe through the pain that was assaulting her in white hot bursts.

"Jesus you scared me what are you doing here so late?" if Sophie wasn't in so much pain she would have recognized the instantly. "Are you hurt?" that pulled Sophie out of her pain a bit. Well enough to yell at the masculine voice that was being so insensitive.

"Nope I normally bleed from my arm profusely." Sophie blamed the pain for unusual sharpness. She felt a warm body crouch down on her left side.

"Here let me help you. Sorry for before I didn't know you were hurt and I was a little to startled to know that you were hurt. Here let me take a look." A large warm gripped her arm gently pulling her arm closer to him. Sophie finally looked up at the face of who she previously considered a jerk. She gasped, realizing it was Remus who had startled Duchess into taking a chunk out of her arm. "I'm sorry did I hurt you?" concern flashed into his eyes and his forehead scrunched a little in worry.

"A little, but you can't help it." Sophie covered as skillfully as possible, trying to hide her recognition of him. Remus just nodded and proceeded to pull back the tattered remains of the front sleeve of her robe. She only had three gashes that were of any relevance. "These will have to get cleaned maybe we should go to the infirmary." Though it was phrased as a question Sophie had a feeling it wasn't. Sophie balked at the idea of making the trip down to the infirmary with Remus. She really liked talking with him, she really did but she didn't want him to let him know who she was yet. She didn't care really what Gwen thought or tried to do to her but since no one had been her friend all these years and now finally _finally _she had someone and she didn't want to chance it.

"No, its fine. I can make my own way down to the infirmary." Sophie tried to smile taking her arm away from him grimacing when the pain hit from jarring it.

"I am responsible for scaring the owl into hurting you. I'm taking you to the infirmary. Come on, I'll help you up." He grabbed her under the arms lifting her up to her feet and waiting, letting her get them under her.

"You really don't have to you know?" even though she knew it wouldn't make a difference, she tried anyways.

"After the way that I snapped at you during lunch at the library today? You should probably avoid me, all I have ever done to you is yell at you and get you injured." He smiled down at her crookedly.

"In my defense, you just keep running into me, no real choice there." He flinched slightly, pricked by something she had said.

"Yes I guess this like everything else is my fault." He sighed. Sophie jumped in to reassure him.

"Its not really either of our faults, its…" she trailed off looking for the proper word.

"Fate?" He offered up with a smile for her. She smiled back at him flinching on the inside from the intimacy of the word, and the irony of at the same time.

"I guess fate would be as good a word as any." She tried to keep her tone light.

"Alright let's get you to the infirmary." He swung her good arm around his shoulder and put his arm around her waist.

"I'm not limping or anything you don't need to hold me." Sophie remarked a little forcefully, knowing full well what this looked like.

"But this way if you faint from blood loss or what not, than I can catch you sooner." His argument seemed sound especially when after the first few steps she took the room started to spin go black around the edges.

"I don't faint." She said strongly. Remus just laughed at her noticing how much more weight she was placing on him.

"So what are you doing up in the Owlry this late at night?" She remarked farther along in their journey. Now that they had been moving it was very nice to have him there to lean on.

"The same question can be asked about you?" Sophie was too busy looking at the painting they were passing to see the look he flashed her.

"That's an easy answer actually. I was finishing my weekend homework in one night." the mixture of exhaustion and blood loss was having an interesting effect on her, making her more talkative than she normally was with almost perfect strangers, despite her written friendship with him. She noticed how comfortable she was around him as well, much more than she should have been, something her non-foggy brain would have noticed.

"You do your homework in Owlry?" she opened her mouth to answer to say she was sending a letter to a pen pall only to close it again.

"I was sending a letter to my parents actually." She lied. She tried to think quickly to make the lie a little more believable. "I finished it after my homework. My father gets worried if I don't send letters often enough. Now enough about me, why were you in the Owlry this late at night?"

"The short answer is that I couldn't sleep and I like that room." Sophie acknowledge the fact they both loved that room not that he was covering for his real reason for being out and about.

They walked in silence for a while, which was perfectly fine with Sophie. The less she and Remus talked in person the less likely he was to make any connection between _A Lady_ and herself, her real self. She let her mind drift looking at the old paintings glaring at the pair for waking them up. I thought wandered into Sophie's head and she blurted it out before she thought of what she was doing.

"What do you like about it?" Remus looked confused down at Sophie.

"Like about what?"

"I guess that was a little vague… sorry bout that. The Owlry, I was wondering what you liked about the Owlry?" Sophie blushed slightly in embarrassment.

"Oh, well I don't know. The view is nice, and no one is there at the times I come." He shot her a pointed look. "Well normally at least. Why do you ask?"

"No reason, just making conversation really."

"Do you like it?"

"Like what? The Owlry?" She assumed yes. "I really like it actually. The tall windows, the feeling of window rushing around you, there's no place else I know of that has that." A smile played lazily across her face. Remus couldn't stop himself from smiling as well. Realizing what he was doing he dropped the smile and thanked the poor lighting, hoping it would hide his blunder.

"I guess your right. In the winter time it's colder than the Arctic Circle. I don't know how the owls stand it, feathers or no feathers."

"I'm guessing you don't like the cold?" you could hear the smile in her voice.

"No. I really don't. There is no good reason to be cold, so I try to refrain from it." Sophie openly laughed at that.

"I especially love it in the winter. When it's snowing, the sun shining through the white layers of clouds. I see it as a personal attack on the clouds by the sun. The sun getting back at some sort of weather cloud, it can't contend with rain storms so it feels it necessary to shine through the snow clouds when ever it can." She laughed merrily, remembering fond memories. "My favorite part is standing in the middle of the Owlry while the winds are particularly high, the snow swirls in though the tall windows and glints like shards of glass or of crystal, winding around you in a way that could only happen in a magnificent dream, or something a kin to it."

"Glass or crystal? It couldn't be made of diamond?" he sounded amused at her child like enthusiasm.

"No it couldn't possibly be. Something that wonderful wouldn't need to be expensive. No something that exquisite could only be something that every person could enjoy. It has to be crystal, colorful, graceful, and beautiful in its simplicity. Crystal." Remus had a feeling Sophie had revealed more than she wished to in that little story. He didn't get a chance to ask anything further, for they had arrived at the infirmary.

Walking in the door Remus led Sophie to the nearest bed and left to fetch the nurse, rapping on her door bringing Professor Hull quickly. A portly matronly looking woman answered, alarm shown in her face.

"Remus what is it? It's not your time of the month, yet you still have a week." Remus stopped her by holding up her hand.

"It's nothing like that." He quickly reassured her. "Its Sophia Naldeg, she was injured by an owl that I startled. Her arms hurt pretty bad." Concern weaved in and out of his voice.

Relief shows in the matronly women's face. The prospect of a simple owl injury was much preferable to the thought of a werewolf bite. Remus grimaced to himself mentally knowing what Professor Hull what thinking. He would have to agree of course, but it was slightly sad, in his eyes, that that should be her major concern anytime he came to see her. Being what he was always made him feel like a leper, despite how much his friends tried to change his mind. It was still something he had to keep from most of the people in his life, a rather major fact about his existence that he couldn't reveal. Granted it was much better than the alternative, he hated lying to everyone all the same.

"Is she still coconscious?" Professor Hull's question broke Remus out of his revere.

"Ah yes, actually she yelled at me at first, when I asked if she was alright." Professor Hull gave him a weird look.

"Are you sure it's Sophia?" he nodded. "Well do you know her well than?" he shook his head. "That's interesting, she comes in once or twice a year in the winter, prone to lung infections, and she's always the quietest, most polite girl I have ever seen. I have never heard of her even raising her voice. It's a mystery among the professors about her, one of the most talented potion brewers we have seen in decades, as well as an excellent transfigurest. None of the staff ever sees her with anyone though, she normally completely alone, which boggles our minds because she is such a nice girl." Remus decided that that Professor Hull didn't know she was rambling, and revealing things she shouldn't have been. Probably because she's happy about not having to treat a werewolf bite, he thought blackly.

"Sophie what seems to be the matter?" Professor Hull called out in warm greeting. Sophie was still lying in the bed that Remus had left her in. when she failed to answer, Remus rushed to her side fearing the worst. Professor Hull just went and gathered the supplies she needed leaving Remus to worry about Sophie. She was relaxed and at peace, errant curls falling across her sleeping face. Remus couldn't help but smile at the serenity in her face. She really is quite pretty, he thought while brushing the curls away. He wasn't sure what it was about this girl, but he felt like he knew her somehow, felt like she was keeping something from him.

"You can go on to bed now Remus, I can handle it from here." Briskly Professor Hull set to her task, first by exposing the slashes left by the owl's talons. Remus flinched seeing the three long angry red marks that were causing her skin to swell in what must be agonizing pain. He was suddenly even happier that she was asleep and not awake to notice the pain. "Mr. Lupin, I believe I dismissed you." The nurse chided him sharply.

"Sorry Professor, just one last question. Will she be alright? No scars or anything?" Professor Hull looked at him suspiciously.

"No, she will just fine, just a day in the hospital wing to make sure no infections set in or something nasty like that, but no scars or anything, by the time she wakes up she wont even be in pain. Though you young man better watch how you enter the Owlry for now on. I like you Remus, despite your condition, but I will stick up for this poor girl." Remus smiled, nodded, and left. Sophie might not have any friends but she did have a protector in Nurse Hull. Remus was left wondering what he wanted to be to her if anything.

OH YA A/N TIME!!!! I am so happy to have finished this chapter!!!!!! I have been working on it for WEEKS!!!! A sentence or two here or there then maybe a page then a dry spell for a while. I ment to have this out two weeks ago. I ment to have this out by the release of the new hp movie. But stuff got in the way. Moving on anyways so ya heres chapter three wonderfull chapter three! In which Sophie and Remus spend a lot more time together than I ever planned to have them spend together in one chapter so soon.(I am very confused at these changes in events) but I am not sad about it!!!! So now random little rambilings from me one! Patrick Verona from 10 things I hate about you Rocks my socks!!!! Both movie and tv version of him second only to my Sesshomaru who no one could ever top! And my newest love which also announces MY NEWEST FANFIC!!!! I am in the process of writing a True Blood Fanfic starring the incredible GODDRIC!!!!!!! Yes I love him

"She provoked me." A shaky voiced Merana attempts to defend herself.

"As you have provoked me." Icily said with deadly intent.

I almost died from happiness when he said that line he was so HOT in that moment that I could have died happly. But im weird like that…. It shall be a week or so but true blood fans I shall becoming out with a goddric Oc fic and if they kill him in the next episode or any episode for that matter I shall personally kill them!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Im okay *takes calm deep breathes* umm besides that I think that's it JA NE!!!!!

PS healing deep wounds fans I am still totally revamping it I truly hate what it is right now but IT SHALL CHANGE!!!! AND EVIE SHALL NOT BE WIMPY!!!!!!!!


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Sophie woke up in a slightly uncomfortable hospital wing bed. The long hall was blissfully empty leaving her in peace to collect her thoughts. A thin wrapping of bandage was around her arm, reminding her of the damage done to it last night or technically this morning in all truth. Her growling stomach told her it was way passed breakfast and lunch and was very angry with her. A clock on the far wall announced it to be around three. She was deciding whether to get up and leave or wait for Madam Hull when Madam Hull herself walked into the room.

"Ah Sophia your up!" she greeted the girl cheerfully. "How are you feeling this evening?" she smiled warmly.

"Ah okay thank you. Madam Hull am I going to be able to leave tonight?" Sophie asked a little impatiently.

"After I redo your bandage you are free to go. Horrible way to spend you weekend, cooped up in here." She talked about this and that keeping up an endless flow of chatter while re-bandaging Sophie's arm. The gash's had mostly healed and wouldn't require bandages after one more night. She finished quickly and helped Sophie sit up and eventually stand. Sophie became so light headed on her first attempt she instantly fell back.

Finally steady on her feet Sophie turned to thank the older woman who always had been very motherly towards her. Before she could, Madam Hull said something that made Sophie freeze. "That young man who helped you here last night, Remus Lupin? He came to see you this morning; you hadn't woken up yet though so he stayed for a good half hour or so passing time by writing some letter. He left when he had finished it. Never said a word or anything just came in sat down and went to work. Feels guilty I suppose, he told me how he startled the owl. Well I'm all done here. You're free to go!" she said briskly and walked off not giving Sophie a chance to say anything.

Sophie pondered Remus's motives during her walk up to her dormitory. Her mind kept jumping to the thought that he might have recognized her as _A Lady, _it wasn't very likely, but at the same time Sophie couldn't help but think of the worst. Madam Hull's explanation was the most likely, that he felt remorse and wanted to make amends. She just sighed, wondering how her life could get anymore complicated.

Sophie had reached her room by this time. She put no effort into hurriedly changing her clothes, still slightly light headed. A tapping at her window brought her out of her revere Duchess was at the window, hooting and scratching on the glass demanding to be let in. Sophie chuckled a little before crossing the room to unlatch the window. Duchess slipped into the room as soon as there was room enough to do so. She hovered as best she could hooting and cooing. Sophie held out her good arm to the distressed owl. She immediately settled and started to preen threw Sophie's hair.

"Calm down Duchess dear, I'm fine and I'm not mad at you, it wasn't your fault." The distressed owl continued to fidget nervously without being still. "You know all this worry is not behavior befitting someone like you noble self?" Sophie tried to joke; she laughed as Duchess ceased her anxious motions and reverted to her regal self. "Much better my sweet." Sophie cooed stroking her corky friend lovingly.

Just then, there was yet another tap at the window a `great brown ball of an owl was also scratching at the window. Letting Duchess settle herself on the top of a bed post Sophie unlatched the window to let the second owl into to the room. After being let in, the owl promptly fell to the floor.

"Not the most coordinated of owls now are we?" Sophie asked with a chuckle. A hoot could be heard behind her and a none too dignified one. Laughing the girl turned to acknowledge Duchess. "Don't be offended my dear, while not the most graceful he is still one of your kind." Duchess just ruffled her feathers and looked insulted.

Smiling Sophie untied the letter from the owl's foot and helped it back out the window so it could go find its perch in the owlry hopefully close enough to the floor so it wouldn't damage its few remaining brain cells.

Sophie's attention switched then from the comical scene that had just played out to the letter clasped in her hand. Taking a deep breathe she unrolled it and began to read fearing the worst.

_Dear Lady,_

_ I truly wish we could do away with these games. There is much I wish to tell you that a letter I feel would just not suffice. As to your question, feel free to ease drop on me any day, more of a chance for me to finally figure out who you are. Things between Gwen and me are, strained to say the least. She is constantly trying to find some sort of horrible fault or event to pin on me. We didn't use to be like this, it used to seem like we did everything but fight now its like we do nothing but as clique and mellow dramatic as it sounds. I swear that there is nothing I am hiding from her save one thing that I truly can not tell her. I feel horrible for it, and I blame much of the state of things on myself. Part of the blame does go to her however. If she would just trust me and drop all of these pretenses... If EVERYONE would stop the deception things would be better. _

Sophie flinched at the intense emotion in the sentence. She knew that she was a major part of the deception going on in Remus's life even if he doesn't. She was lying about who she was to him both in person and through a letter but she could think of no other way. She continued reading…

_I apologize I am having a very rough day and I should not be taking it out on you. You have never lied to me _(she flinched again.)_ and it is unfair to explode at you for it. I must be losing it… you're the second person in the last two days that I have taken advantage of for no reason and I am sorry. I must cut this letter short because I would like to mail this after breakfast..._

_Yours exhaustedly,_

_Remus Lupin_

Sophie looked down at the letter with guilt flowing like ice through her veins. She hated lying to him when what he seemed to need the most right now was the truth. But-could the truth really be what he needed? She let out an aggravated cry and threw herself upon her bed.

"What do I do Duchess?" Sophie lamented. "Telling him the truth means that I won't have to lie to him anymore. But it's so much easier not to, so much safer. Nothing good comes from the truth. Mother telling me the truth about my parentage was a mistake." She told the creature, pausing to collect her scattered thoughts. "The only thing Mother has ever done for me was to not tell Father that I'm not his. I sincerely think that is the only thing keeping me in the house."

At this point she had forgotten she was speaking aloud, she was so absorbed in her crisis of conscious. So distracted was she that she missed the sound of the door cracking open when she had paused, nor did she hear it click back closed. Duchess was startled by the noise the second time and hooted in distress, flying to the window begging to be released; an absent minded Sophie obliged her before collapsing on her bed to fret out her worries.

The ease dropper on the other hand rushed down to the common room looking to share this newest juicy tidbit she had just heard. Scanning the common room, she located Joseph and rushed over to him.

"Oh Joseph you have no idea what I just over heard when you sent me to find Gwen for you!" the perky girl squealed kneeling next to the arm of the chair that Joseph had lazily arranged himself in, the aura of control oozing off of him. The complete sense of control he exuded was like a drug to someone like Natalie whose every thought needed to be directed; indeed, it worked like that for most people.

"What is that?" he inquired with disinterest. By this time he was completely used to Natalie, throwing herself at him and trying to get herself endeared to him by way of her 'useful information'.

"It's about that Sophie girl who no one talks to? Well apparently, she's illegitimate! Everyone thinks she comes from this high class pure-blooded family but she's not a Naldeg at all! Her mother cheated on her father _and_ got pregnant from it! In fact, the only reason that her father even stands her is because he doesn't know! I did know I didn't bring you Gwen but I did good still with this didn't I?" she batted her muddy eyes and pushed herself closer to him. She had no idea as to how useful the information she had just divulged was.

Joseph's lips curled into a sickening facsimile of a smile and pulled her closer. "Yes my pet you did very well." He crushed her lips to his for a fleeting moment before pulling away. Natalie whined trying to reestablish the connection, one look form Joseph sent her pouting to a seat across the room. He had been worried about how he was going to threaten Sophie. All of his checking arounds had told him nothing she seemed to be the perfect angel.

He was still contemplating his next act when Sophie herself came hurriedly down the stair with a letter clutched in her palm Joseph got up quickly and followed.

Sophie was most defiantly in a hurry. She had made the decision to tell Remus and hope for the best, she was just going to send him a simple note saying who she was and face the results of it. Tucking some stray curls from around her face back behind her ears, she wished not for the first time that duchess had just waited for a few more minutes. Sophie was terrified that she would change her mind by the time she got to the owlery, and she was terrified she wouldn't

Opening the large door, she stated scanning for Duchess. She groaned loudly when she couldn't find her. "She must be out hunting or flying." She whispered softly. Looking around, she tried to find another school owl that could help her. She almost let out another groan when she saw the only school owl currently available was the same dim witted one that had delivered Remus's last letter. "I guess you'll have to do. Well come here you lazy lot." Sophie ordered. The buffoon just glared at her and stuck his head back under his wing. "Do owls even do that you insane creature?" she commented to it coming closer to attempt to attach her letter to its leg.

When she was close enough, it gazed up at her gave an outraged hoot and hopped to the floor. Sophie sighed and took a step closer to the asinine animal. The creature hearing her foot steps hopped farther away. "Oh no we are _not_ going to play that game! You will deliver this letter before I back out!" with this impassioned cry she started to chase the owl around the owlry with him always one hop in front of her. This was how the man who next opened the owlry door found her.

"I hope this is not a normal behavior for you?" he commented causing Sophie to freeze in mid grab. "Some people may judge you to be crazy." Remus laughed at the indignant expression of outrage on Sophie's face. Turning to face him, she quickly stuffed her letter in the back pocket of her jeans.

"I am not going to dignify that with a response." She stated defiantly. He laughed out right causing Sophie to smile in return.

"I did say some people would find you crazy, I do not place myself in that particular category." Warmth shone form his green eyes causing Sophie to shiver ever so slightly. "Though I am beginning to wonder if you live here, considering the number of times I have seen you here." Mirth played through the tone of his voice.

"No I don't spend all of my time here; I do venture out to the library on occasion. Though I fear that anywhere else would be just too over whelming for me, plus I might meet people who would judge me for chasing after a difficult rat with wings." She threw a disdainful glance over her shoulder to the bird in question. She was ecstatic to hear the sound of his laughter in response to her self depreciating joke.

"How is our arm by the way? I came to see you in the hospital wing this morning but you were asleep." Concern winded its way through his voice. Sophie stepped towards him and held out her arm.

"It's all fine now." She pulled back her sleeve to show him the completely healed forearm. She smiled brightly at him just to make sure he knew she held no harsh feelings for the startled owl incident.

"Good I am so sorry about it and if there is any thing I.." he was cut off by the sound of the door opening forcefully. Joseph stepped through quickly sizing up the situation.

"Sophie here's where you've been hiding!" he exclaimed with all inclinations of being affectionate. "I have been looking everywhere for you? Why didn't you wait to send your letter to your family until I could come with you? I don't want you to get hurt again."

Walking without pausing he gathered Sophie into his arms. Sophie attempted to push him away only to be stopped by the quittich captain's arms. Leaning in close to her ear he whispered. "Play along or I tell daddy how your aren't his little girl and never was."

Sophie stopped struggling. Using one arm to keep her crushed against her him, his other hand went to her chin to tilt her face up to look at him and hold her head securely there. "You mean the world to me Sophie, don't you understand that?" he leaned in closer and Sophie could do nothing to stop him from crushing his lips to hers, nothing but pray for it to be over.

"Remus, give us some privacy would you?" Shock turned to horror as she realized that Remus was still there baring witness to all of this as well as what it must look to him. Getting the best look she could at him considering the fact that Joseph had her head trapped, she watched as he walked away. "Good man." He called after him. He didn't release his grip of her until he heard the audible click of the door that signaled Remus's exit. When he did, Sophie exploded from his arms.

"What the hell was that!" she screamed at him and spat to get the taste of him out of her mouth.

"Keep your voice down that was not a pleasures thing for me either so stop acting so offended." He hissed back.

"Why did you do it then!" she shrilled, once again trying to find an owl to use to send her letter. She decided to explain this unfortunate event after Remus knew who she was. Finding one, she took the letter out of her back pocket. Joseph quick as a flash grabbed the letter from her hand and scanned through it before shredding it.

"You forget yourself Sophie. I told you that Gwen and Remus need to stay together and that involve him not knowing who you are." Venom dripped from his every word.

"What does Remus knowing who I am have anything to do with anything!" she shot back.

"Any fool can see that their relationship is hanging on by threads, and I have seen the way he looks at you and read the letters he has written to you, well one of them. He would drop Gwen for you in a heart beat if he A) knew who you were or B) though you weren't other wise involved with someone, hence the necessity for the earlier display."

"Then why do you want them together! If you want to be with her and any fool can see that you do." She threw his own words back at him. "Then shouldn't you want them to break up?" she inquired.

"I want what Gwen can give me, and she can only do that if her parents think she is dating a nice respectable man such as Remus." With what little knowledge that Sophie possessed of this man it only made sense that it was something so selfish. "It is also in your best interest not to tell him."

"Why is that?" Sophie scoffed. "I am not afraid of any thing you can do to me."

"It's not what I can do it's what I can tell. I don't know who your real father is Sophie girl but I know who it isn't." her blood ran cold. "I see you forgot that little tidbit of information I told you earlier I had. If you don't want me to tell your father which by the way is from what I understand the only reason your still living at home then you will keep this a secret. Sophie knew she had lost the battle and just stood there numbly.

"Now, why don't you come walk back to the common room with me just incase Remus is anywhere close by." And somewhere not to far away Remus was sitting looking at an old piece of parchment hoping that Joseph would leave Sophie alone for long enough he could go talk to her and that something horrible had happened and they were not a couple. His worst fears were confirmed though as he watched them walk back to what was presumably the Ravensclaw common room before parting ways. Neither on of them would sleep well that night. Both lost in fretful dreams.

Oh ya A/N time!!!!!: I don't know about you but this is the portion of the fanfic I most look forward to writing!!! anyways yes so here is chapter four in all of its glory…. Of lack there of…. relatively short authors notes today for various reasons…. Um once again I love all of you who read review or add me to any sort of watch list smd healing deep wounds should be updating soon as well. Well till next time I SHALL WORK HARD!!!! JANE!!!


	5. 5 Chatper Five

Chapter Five

_Dear Remus, _

_I do feel for that poor girl you yelled at, having only heard you yell through letter form, I'm sure you are a sight to inspire fear in person. Just kidding. I'm sure at worst she was just confused. Though it does surprise me that you lost your temper with anyone, from everything I've heard about you, you're the most level headed of your entire merry band of hellions. _

_When it comes to Gwen, I dare to say I have a theory. You openly admit you're keeping something from her, well reasons aside that could be the root of all of this. You have been going out for almost a year if gossip is to be trusted; she's most likely noticed you hiding something from her. Doubt is like a weed; it takes root in the mind and chokes the life out of reason. Maybe you can try something to reinforce her trust in you? I know you haven't done anything to warrant the doubt but she's probably not thinking too clearly, if you love her, it's an option to fix the relationship. _

Sophie paused in her letter writing. What she was saying was very valid, she reminded herself. If you didn't possess all of the information that Sophie was privy too at least. Truthfully, she would say that the tension stemmed form a cheating Gwen projecting her guilt onto Remus. The theory she wrote was completely valid and could also be the answer, she tried to convince herself. Sophie shook her head knowing she didn't really believe that.

Honestly, Sophie almost wanted them to break up. She could see herself really liking Remus and being great friends, but her family was still more important to her. She loved her parents despite everything, she defiantly loved her little sister, and she was going to do nothing that might take Tessie away from her. Praying for the strength to keep that conviction she soldiered on.

_One more thing before I go that I feel must be said. I really am sorry that I can't tell you who I am. I want to! I just… I __**can't**__. I don't pretend to know whatever the secret you're keeping from Gwen is, but my identity is just as important to me. Trust me when I say that you actually want me to remain A Lady. _

_And with that said I really do value your letters! They have become the highlight of my day whenever I receive one. I remember you asked me to tell you about my friends? Well truth is I would be telling you about, well you. I don't really have anyone I talk to on a regular basis that isn't a teacher besides you, that's probably why the Room told me to write to someone, anyone. It's horrible and to use your word clique, but it's the truth. Despite my short comings, I really do want to be someone you can trust. _

_Yours as truly as she can be at this moment,  
A Lady _

_P.S. Just so you know, while I can't tell you who I am, that doesn't mean if you guess I go away. So if you guess who I am, then our game can end._

Looking up at the moon though her window Sophie couldn't help but marvel at its brilliance. It was the first full moon since her returning to school, and it really was a breath taking sight.

Sophie hadn't been able to resist at the end of her letter to challenge Remus to figure out who she was. Her family could keep her from saying anything, but a part still wanted him to find out, she could deal with the consciences later. Sighing she sealed the letter and left for the Owlry hopeing that this wasn't some huge mistake.

Fifteen minutes later she was back in her dormitory and laying in bed wonder what to make of her journey to the Owlry and back. The events included a big fat nothing, no run ins with Joseph, no interludes with Remus. She hadn't even seen a ghost let alone a living person! It was so uneventful it was worth mentioning giving her normal excursions now a day. It was seriously bugging Sophie, it seemed like some dark premonition. Shaking herself physically to rid her of such mental thoughts, Sophie ordered herself to go to sleep, Monday was only a few hours away and things would soon enough return to her definition of normal.

CLACK! Sophie stabbed a piece of sausage with a little more force than necessary; this earned her quite a few looks from her classmates. It had been four days, _four days_! Since she had sent Remus her most recent letter. It had _never_ taken him so many days to respond to her! It was starting to make her worry and confirm her fear that she just wasn't cut out for having friends or anyone close to her.

The first rustling of wings alerted her to the arrival of the morning post. Sophie didn't bother to look up. She wasn't expecting today to be any different from yesterday. "Or the day before or the day before that or the day before that!" she muttered under her breathe. This sort of anxious waiting was new to Sophie and she wasn't taking it well. Truly, it was pricking a temper she hadn't known she possessed. Remus seemed to have an unnerving way of doing things like that.

When she heard an owl land in front of her, she felt her hopes soar and dark mood instantly lift. Taking a good look at the owl, she descended back into her black mood, it was only Winston, the family owl. This could only mean that her mother had written her about if she was allowed to come home for any upcoming holidays. Winston held out his leg pompously gazing at her with contempt in amber gaze. "We never did like each other did We Winston?" she asked the owl oblivious to the giggles that incited from the girls sitting a few seats down. Winston's only response was to fly away after she had taken the letters.

That actually confused Sophie, normally her mothers missives were short, barely taking up half a sheet of parchment, this one was large enough apparently to warrant two envelopes. The first one was addressed to "Sophia Naldeg" with all the correct address information written in neat crapped script that denoted it as her mothers. Taking a breathe she opened the letter and read.

_Dear Sophia, _

_I request your presence at Christmas this year. Please do not write if you are going to waste my time for I have none that you can waste._

_Yours truly,  
Mrs. Melissa Naldeg _

Sophie had always laughed at how her mother closed her letters with her full name. "Well when your only joy in life is your name you have to find some way to show it off I suppose?" Sophie was struck by how mean that statement was, causing her to laugh. Overall, it was the standard sort of letter she received from her mother prior to any break granted Christmas was three months away still it wasn't note worthy. Sophie then looked down at the second letter curious to see who it was from.

_To Sophie_

_Wherever Hogwarts is, I think she's in Ravensclaw!_  
The sloppy slanted script belonged to her youngest sister Tessie! She ripped open the letter furiously, wanting to hear from her dearest sister.

_Dear Sophie, _

_Since I'm going to Hogwarts next year too, mom said I should start to learn how to use an owl so I can send her letters! So she's been having me tie all of her letters for her. She never sends you my letters when I ask her so I just included this cause I miss you so much! _

Sophie smiled fondly. She always missed Tessie fiercely. She would write to her once a month at least but never received anything back due to her tyrannical parents that didn't love her. She read on hungrily,

_I'm so excited I get to go to school with you next year! I know you've only been at school for almost a month but I miss you so much already I could just expire!_

_Do you like that phrase sissy? I just read it in a book and I thought it was so dramatic! It's become my new catchphrase! You really need to write to me sissy now that I can answer you! _

_Your dearest little sister whose about to expire from lack of her dearest older sister, _

_Tessie_

Sophie couldn't hold in a giggle, Tessie was such a character. Their two older sisters had become bitter and conceded in their years, but Tessie has always had such a refreshing spirit. She really was the light of Sophie's life and she was looking forward to her coming to Hogwarts next year just as much as Tessie was.

The surprise appearance of Tessie's letter lifted Sophie's spirit for the rest of the day. She was laying in bed reading a book happily when she heard the dorm door open. Sophie recognized Gwen and two of her friends by their voices, the curtains were drawn closed so they didn't know of Sophie's presence.

"So how are you and Remus doing Gwen?" asked one of her cronies. Sophie almost stopped breathing, trying to stay as quite as she could so that they would go on.

"Well he was sick for most of this week, in the hospital wing and everything, sleeping of course like he always is when his anemia starts acting up on him." Gwen's tone made it sound like she thought he was over playing it, in fact that's exactly what she thought. If it wasn't for the fact she had seen him in the hospital wing on more than one occasion when he disappeared like this, she would have thought he was faking it all. No man, no real man got sick every month. Was he menstruating or something?

Sophie on the other hand felt absolutely horrible. Here she was thinking that he had completely forgotten her or hated her. She could vividly remember calling him several nasty names that she was now turning on herself. Sick! And in the hospital wing! She was truly heartless.

Gwen continued and Sophie listened with rampant attention.

"He came to see me today though, and told me he had something special planned for the Hogsmeade trip this Saturday." Her cronies all ooowwwed appropriate amounts and topics changed.

Sophie was left confused though. It sounded like he had read her letter, but why then had she gotten no response? She took a deep breathe to clear her thoughts as she heard the door click closed as the girls exit.

"I need to clear my head" she commented to herself. With that, she jumped off her bed and walked briskly down to the library.

Once at her destination, she roamed without direction. Her feet led her to the table she had first met Remus's at, the latter being who was now occupying it. Sophie froze, turned on her heels and back tracked. "I'm such a coward." She muttered to herself. Instead of facing Remus and talking to him like she should be doing; she was hiding childishly behind a bookshelf looking through a crack at him.

He was sitting much in the same position she had originally found him a week or so ago. Dishelved hair fell to cover most of his face, hands holding his head up and shoulders stumped in an almost defeated manner. From the small areas of his skin she could see, a gray parlor that wasn't normally there was evident, left over from his sickness no doubt, she mused to herself. She couldn't help but think how sad he looked.

Two rolls of parchment rested in front of him, ink and quill also rested close at hand.  
It looked to her like he was about to write back to her, so why then did he look so uninterested in doing so? Was she right and he actually didn't want to talk to her anymore? She had just gotten up her courage to go and talk to him when someone beat her to it.

"My oh my, why doesn't someone seem pensive!" Sophie had only met the man a handful of times and not under the most amicable of circumstances but she recognized Sirius Black's voice easily enough. "So come on Moony, or moody as the case may be, what's the matter?" he was answered by silence. "Oh come on tell your dear old Padfoot what's wrong and he'll make it all better. If you don't I'll tell Grace your sick, and do you really want mother on your back?" He coerced. He apparently wasn't taking this that seriously; at least it seemed like that in Sophie's mind.

"I wish you could Padfoot." Remus's muffled voice commented.

"Well if you don't tell me than I know I cant do anything." The sound of wood scraping against wood announced Sirius sitting down in a chair.

"I don't know if I should keep writing to her." Sophie dared not to breathe.

"Oh that mystery lady who has your panties all in a bunch? Why would you stop?"

"She refuses to tell me who she is still!" he sounded so aggravated.

"So? Will knowing who she is really change that much for you?" Sirius asked bluntly.

"Well, it would be nice to be able to talk to her in person." He threw back defensively.

"Look at it this way mate, you already have a girlfriend so knowing her name isn't really going to do anything now is it? So you can talk to her in person, so what? Is that really all that's bothering you?" Sirius asked. "I know you and Gwen have been a little shaky recently, maybe you're trying to use this girl as a replacement for her until you and Gwen are good again. If it was…" he interrupted by a new voice that Sophie didn't recognize.

"Sirius, Lupin! So this is where you two have been hiding! Come on mates we have work to do!" Sophie assumed that this was James Potter. Not wanting to risk being caught at this point and not wanting to hear anymore really, Sophie took her leave.

She didn't want to go back to her dorm, so she ended up pacing in a corridor until the Room of Requirements opened up for her. Inside she found a large bed she could throw herself on, she proceeded to do just that.  
"Augh what have a done! I always find some way to screw things up! I'm so stupid!" she lamented loudly to herself. "I couldn't just leave well enough alone! I could have said that I went to a different school with a similar room! But no, I can't lie like that I have to swear that I'll tell him as much of the truth that I can! Now some jerk knows my dad's not my dad and is holding it over my head! FANTASTIC! Right when I about to tell him who I was also!" a tapping at the window caused her to jump and give a little shriek.

It was only Duchess scratching to get in, which confused Sophie but left her a little calmer. She stood and walked over to the window and let the owl in, marveling the whole time, that window hadn't been real last time she was here. Duchess took a perch on Sophie's arm as per usual and held out her leg. There was a letter attached to it, Sophie's fingers trembled as she unfolded the letter and started to read.

_Dear Lady, _

_Sorry for my tardiness in writing you back, I've been sick this past week and have been able to do little more than sleep, I hope you didn't think it was me avoiding you. While I am blessed with many friends, you are a special case, I feel more honest with you than I do most people, and for that fact, I will respect your inability to tell me who you are. That being said I WILL figure out who you are anyways because I know you want to tell me. Don't try to deny it you wouldn't have reminded me of your little challenge if you didn't want me to know. Well I'm being called away to perform my duty to my friends, I'll leave you with one question, tell me about your classes, you can do that at least since you insist to tease me as such. _

_Yours mischievously, _

_Moony_

_P.S. Moony is the nickname my friends us, maybe one day I'll tell you how I came across it._

Sophie smiled; maybe all was not lost yet.

A/N: omg I cant believe chapter 5 is finally done. FIVE PAGES IS A LOT!!! I would like to point out I some how managed to get this chapter done during AP week!(AP course are high school courses that at the end of the year if you score high enough on a test you get college credit for, I had AP Literature on Thursday, and I have AP Psyche on Tuesday.) so ya this chapter a lot I feel has happened to move the story line but at the same time stretch things, if you don't understand that now you will eventually as chapters continue. Um so I got an itouch(amazing little thing) and that's really how I was able to finish this chapter, I wrote it on there. Another chapter of healing deap wounds should be up soon too cause of the itouch as well. I think that's really all I have to say right now, um bleach rules and Sesshis mine JA NE!!! OOOH LASTLY REVIEW!!!!


	6. Chapter 6

_Dear Investigator,_

_I love potions. There's just something about it that I can't quite express. At first, it seems that all you do is follow directions, but after you figure out the trick, it's so much more! What would happen if I added just a little more of this? What would happen if I stirred it just a little longer? It's a big game of what if that I fell in love with my first year. _

_As you can imagine, this sort of rampant curiosity and absolute disrespect for procedure isn't the safest. I frustrated the Potions Master my whole first year. He couldn't figure out how someone who seemed to always be causing small explosions and losing eyebrows, both theirs and other peoples, would always turn in a correct potion at the end of the day. It would really freak him out when some of my potions were _better_ than his. If it wasn't for Headmaster, I think I would have been kicked out. Instead, I was put into advanced potions courses. Occasionally they would ask me what I did differently, so they could improve their recipes. I can't express how happy I was the first time it happened. I had gone from this troublemaker to someone who was useful and more importantly, wanted. _

_In an effort to stay as honest as possible, I think I need to talk about Charms. Charms, as you may or may not know, escapes me completely. Its too rigid, no room for adjustment, for innovation. It's stone. It must be this perfect spiral motion with this perfect incantation. I'm a decent transfiguration student, but getting the movement with the words, it doesn't… work for some reason. _

_Yours,_

_A Lady_

_P.S. Am I to assume that the beards that appeared on all of the Slytherins are your gangs doing?_

_Dear Tessie,_

_I miss you even more than you miss me! Yes your new saying is quite dramatic, fits you very well. Mother is fit to be tied over it isn't she? I would love to see that! _

_How is everything else at home? I never hear what you do when I am away, by the time I return you've forgotten everything and you're onto the marathon of what you did five minutes ago. No, don't scold me Tessie dear, I love that about you. _

_This is so wonderful that we can talk more. Oh and I'll be home for Christmas this year! I know you were upset last year when I ended up staying at school. I promise I will be there this year, and I have all of Hogsmeade to browse to find your present. You'd better be good so I feel more inclined to spend all of my money on you as I always do._

_Your darling older sister who's about to expire from her dramatic younger sister,_

_A Lady_

_Sophie_

_Dear Lady,_

_Ha! Now I know that I looking for a potions master, who's horrible at charms, who may or may not have eyebrows. Well thank you! That narrows it down quite a bit, especially the whole no eyebrows thing._

_For my next question, I ask what house are you in? No, I'm not stupid enough to think I'll actually get an answer, but it never hurts to try. Consider my reasoning, if you're part of Slytherin…Well it's going to be tough to pull pranks on them when I could unwittingly be pranking you. If your part of Gryffindor, I'm just going to kick myself for having missed you for this long. _

_My first question that I actually expect an answer for is most revealing. What, is your favorite color? Also, what is your favorite time of the year? Try not to injury yourself responding to these questions. Their tough, I know._

_Your man of a thousand questions,_

_Lupin_

_P.S. I think this goes without saying but, if you're THE potions master, please just stop writing because I don't think I could ever recover from that._

_Dear Remus,_

_You sick, evil, man! How dare you ask so many questions, and such personal ones at that! Well fine, I will give in to your coercions, there seems to be no stopping you. If you could see me, I am fainting dramatically with a dainty hand pressed lightly to my forehead; the imagery was too good to pass up do to of a letters lacking facilities. _

_To answer your penetrating question, my favorite color is forest green. There's something soothing about it. It conjures up the feeling of wet leaves, and damp earth that been wiped clean by a good storm and everything's bathed in a green hue caused by the sun filtering through the dense leaves. _

_I love the smells and colors of spring, and I love the sights of winter. Winter, when everything's covered in snow transforming the landscape into a different world entirely, but it's too cold. Autumn would have to be my favorite. The time when the air first gets that edge of coldness that caress' you, taking away the unbearable heat of summer and leaves you with that slightly sharp pain in your lungs when you breathe in deeply. And the brilliant colors! Every shade of red, yellow, and orange, the hint of green pine both in color and in the smell of the air. It's peerless. _

_Yours wringed dry of information,_

_A Lady_

_P.S. I forgot about summer. Summer, in my opinion, is just another name for hell-that-only-last-for-a-few-months. That's all I have to say. _

_Dear Moony,_

_Please stop writing to your ladylove and sighing while your waiting for replies. We love you too! We're worried you're going to need an intervention soon..._

_Talk to your real friends occasionally would ya? _

_I shouldn't have to be doing this,_

_Padfoot_

_Dear Lady,_

_You tease me again. You can't possibly be anyone of my acquaintance, I should be able to recognize someone with as gilded a tongue as yours, at least when you are describing the things you love. I've only known one other person with such a gift, and you could not possibly be her. I don't really know her that well, maybe you do. Her names Sophie Naldeg. She was the girl I spoke of the one I yelled at. She took it remarkably well._

_I see you conveniently skipped over the discussion of houses. Well my theory is that you're in Ravensclaw. You're not mean enough to be in Slytherin, not ordinary enough to be in Hufflepuff, I would have noticed if you were in Gryffindor. Thus you must be apart of Ravensclaw. I don't think you can convince me other wise. _

_You made a comment in your last letter describing your theatrical fainting; you don't have to. Look, there's a masquerade ball for Halloween._

_Go with me._

_. Please, you can wear a mask the entire time, change your hair, change your voice, change anything you want! Gwen isn't going to be there—she'll be going home for the holiday weekend. Please. Just come and meet me. I want to know your real, even if I can't see the real you._

_Remus_

Sophie stared down at the letter in her hand. She wasn't sure how to respond.

That scared her. She should say no, she should write to him now, be her normal happy self, and brush this off. Maybe say she'll going to be out of town. Sophie didn't want to though. What she wanted was to send an owl to him now saying 'meet me at the center of the ballroom at midnight'. What she did do was slam her head against her hands and call herself ten sorts of idiots.

The bells tolling signaled her to rise and go though her day in a haze. What's wrong with wanting to have my own Cinderella moment? She mused. Why can't I transform myself for one night, be the real me. How nice it would be to not worry what anyone thought, not her classmates, not her family, not even Remus. She could worry about what he thought because she _wanted_ to not because she _had_ to.

What about her family though? If he recognized her or Joseph figured out who she was, she couldn't lose her family, not yet at least. All she had to do was stick it out one more year, one year then her family could disown her. She would have an education, and Tessie would be getting hers, and Sophie would be an adult, she would find a way to see Tessie. Somewhere deep in her being, Sophie knew that if the truth came out too soon, her father would find a way to stop her from going to school. He would do his best to crush her. Sophie had to ensure she could stand before she let go of her family. But would one night of whimsy really ruin all of that?

Sophie was much too preoccupied trying to suppress the urge to rip out all of her hair to notice who was sitting at the table she flopped down at later in the library.

"Well, that was quite a sigh." Sophie almost squeaked in surprise. "Something on your mind? My ears are open. With all of the grief I've caused you, I should do something to make amends." Sophie looked at him from her hands, the concern she saw in his eyes and the accompanying smile made her stomach twist.

"It's nothing." She stated lightly-he didn't believe her. "Truly! it's just a letter from home. They want me home for the holidays is all."

"So you're sighing over not getting to go to the ball with Joseph?" his smile was still there, just stiffer, his whole face was in fact.

"No!" Sophie fairly shouted, shooting out of her chair.

"Is everything alright Miss Naldeg?" Mrs. Farahey, the librarian, poked her head around a bookshelf and turned her stern gaze on Remus.

"No! No. Mrs. Farahey, it's my fault. I'm sorry and I'll be more quite." Sophie smiled at her, trying to act normal as she sat back down.

"You never have out bursts like this, Sophie. Are you sure everything is fine?" concern colored her tone. Sophie nodded her head violently and the librarian hesitantly left.

Remus let out a barking laugh. "Why Sophie Naldeg, do you have all of the staff watching out for you?" Sophie looked at him and his astonished expression and laughed. "Mrs. Farahey normally likes me well enough, so does Professor Hull. Yet when you're seen with me they all fall over themselves to make sure your okay."

"It does seem that way when I'm with you now doesn't it?" she flashed him a smile.

"I'm not going out with Joseph, ya know." She kept her head down. "To be perfectly clear, I hate him. I don't know why exactly he pulled that stunt, but it makes my skin crawl when I think about him." Sophie shuddered at the reminder of him touching her.

"I don't think he hates my friends; we haven't done anything to him off of the field. We rarely prank the Ravensclaw. I would say he might be jealous, but that was one of the few times we've met in person. Plus, it's well known I'm dating Gwen." Sophie flinched.

"I'm not exactly sure." Sophie could feel her cheeks getting red from lying to Remus so boldly.

"Well, if he messes with you again, tell me. Between me and my mates, well let's just say he will be taken care of." Remus gave her a dazzling smile. All she could do was try not to swallow visibly at the prospect of Remus retaliatly for her. Joseph would surely tell her father if Remus did anything to him, including looking at him wrong.

"Oh that's not necessary." She hasted to add. "He hasn't bugged me since, I'm sure he won't again." Well as long as I keep my mouth shut, she added silently, looking at the table.

"So are you?" he looked at her expectantly.

"Am I what?" Sophie asked perplexed.

"Oh sorry, there I go again being vague again. Are you going home for the holiday? It is only a three day weekend." Sophie sat and thought. She had already lied and said his letter had been from her family, would she lie and say she's going away for the weekend?

"Cause I was thinking, if you stayed for the ball, you could hang out for a while with me and my gang. I wouldn't ask you to leave your friends or anything like that, but at least come and say hi?" he continued.

Sophie thought of her options. Should she say she was leaving and let _A Lady_ meet Remus? Should she say she was staying and turn him down as _A Lady_? The simplest and smartest option would be to say no with both personas, but she just couldn't. Despite all of the danger, she wanted to see Remus with an intensity that scared her. She found herself hoping to run into him in the library, and on her way to the Owlery. Heck, some days she even wants him to startle Duchess again just so he has to spend some time with her, at least the walk to the hospital wing.

"I'm going home sadly. My sister is all by herself, besides my parents of course, and really misses me. I haven't been able to deny her anything since she was born." Sophie tried to smile and sound like she believed what she was saying. Talking about Tessie made it a little easier.

"Oh, well who am I to deny a little girl her older sister?" his smile was tight. The bell chimed dinner and both persons stood from the table.

"Well I need to run back to my room before dinner so I better get going. It was nice talking to you again Remus."

"The pleasure was all mine Sophie, I hope to see you again soon." He executed a bow, making Sophie giggle.

"As do I Master Lupin." And with an over dramatic curtsy Sophie quite the room.

"So who were you talking to today in the library Moony?" asked James. Sirius perked up from shoveling food into his mouth to look at his friends.

"Sophie Naldeg." Before he could say more Sirius cut in.

"A Naldeg ah? Their almost as bad as Blacks when it comes to being judgmental and elitist." Sirius commented disdainfully. "I've met them on several occasions, only two I really could tolerate were the two youngest. Forget their names but the older of the two looks nothing like her family cept maybe the mom. She was a real black sheep, you could tell. She only talked to her younger sister. The youngster would just go on and on and on about anything and the older sister would just smile and laugh. The mother wouldn't let them be together for long, always called the younger one away. The look on that girls face was remarkable without her little sister, it was like her soul left. She would always become dead and unresponsive, the rest of her family really didn't seem to care." Remus looked at him confused.

"I don't know how that could be Sophie, she always speaks fondly of her family. She's even missing the ball to go home to see them. The time when I startled the owl and injured her was when she was sending a letter home to her family." he paused in his talking so he could untie a letter from an owl's leg that had landed in front of him. He put off opening it, the regal barn owl before him was demanding a treat like some noble; Sirius went on in his silence.

"I'm pretty sure it's Sophie. There are two other Naldeg daughters but there much older. Hey, I could be wrong." He said with a shrug. James made a choking noise.

"Padfoot! You wrong? I've never heard of such an obscene statement!" Sirius growled while James snickered.

"Hey no fighting! We are all going to have a nice, battle free dinner, you hear me?" Grace ordered from the end of the table.

"Ai mother." James and Sirius chorused, their own fight momentarily forgotten given the chance to rib someone else, especially Grace. Grace threw two rolls at their heads and went back to eating as the miscreants grinned and ate the thrown baked goods. Remus shout of joy brought all eyes to him.

"She said yes! She's going to in some form show up!" he smiled widely at them all, waving around a small piece of parchment.

"Good." Sirius stated. "Now we can finally figure out who she is so you can be a little less obsessed with her." Remus looked at him puzzled.

"What do you mean? It's a masquerade, I'm sure she's going to take great lengths to hide who she is." Sirius sighed.

"That's fine, we will use the map! You can't fool the map, not even with magic. So all we have to do is wait for her to show up, one of us checks the map and BAM! We know who she is! Come on Remus, how could you, the brains among us excluding mother, not think of this?"

"I forbid it Sirius." Remus said firmly. "I want her to tell me. If I figure it out it will be without magic. It's more important to me for her to tell me. If I know to soon I won't be able to hold out." he looked stricken.

"Why does that mean I don't get to know?" Sirius said. James nodded in agreement.

"No Sirius, none of you are allowed to look. You all won't be able to contain yourselves. You will let me do this my own way." Sirius looked ready to protest again, so did James.

"You two will let him." Grace's green eyes flashed as she regarded her friends. "This means a lot to Remus, let him do it his way."

"Ai mother." They chorused again earning them two more rolls to the head.

Two tables over under a blue banner Sophie sat mulling over her decision. She was lying to herself and saying that this wasn't going to end badly. She couldn't help it. Guilt gnawed at her like some hungry beast that could not be sated. She could share as much as possible with Remus this way. At least that's the lie she kept telling herself.

She wanted to go with him, wanted it more than she knew she should. _A Lady_ was just the easiest persona. She could completely invent what _A Lady_ looks like, hide who she was better, and still see Remus.

"Well I guess we'll see how everything going to pan out in a week." She muttered to herself while staring at the stars.

A/N: holy crap! You got five pages! there shall be no whining! I would have written more but everything else belongs with the ball which will go down next episode! May I just say I love all of you and I have a confession to make. So, I got my first flameish review, and I say I love any and all reviews and I still hold by that! Though I must say when I read this review and it just picked apart all of my faults with surgeon like precision, lets just say it hurt at first, second, and tenth glance. But because of that review I have been as careful as I could be writing this chapter, hopefully there is some sort of improvement. All of my reviews motivate me, like the one I got today made me finally sit down and finish editing this chapter (yes shocker I do reread this rag). But the constructive criticism one made me want to improve even more so thank you to all who have read this who have this on alert and especially those who write me a review because all of you contribute to this more than I do. I just write stuff down, you force it to come out. Well till next time REVIEW! JA NE!


	7. Chapter 7

_Dear Lady,_

_Thank you so much! No, don't bother responding to this letter; I don't think I could with stand the stress of opening something from you; not when I know you can still cancel .I wanted to tell you that while you'll have to guess what my costume is, I'll be standing by the statue of Ravensclaw founder. I have it on good authority that she both loved Halloween and that there will be a statue of her as one of the decorations. Don't ask me the hoops I had to jump through to gain such privileged information. I can't wait to see you. Please you must show up._

_Yours impatiently _

_Remus Lupin_

_P.S. To give you a hint as to my attire, I finally figured out the origin of your pen name, or quill name as the case maybe. _

Sophie smiled at the letter in her hands. She folded it with obvious affections, tucking it in into one of the many books she had splayed out in front of her. With just a week till the ball; she was more akin to a turbulent ocean than a human being. She was excited to see Remus, scared to see Remus, terrified to see Remus, and over all anxious about the whole affair. With the arrival of his latest letter, any remaining chances of her not going were destroyed.

"He sounds so hopeful." She lamented. "How could I disappoint him like that?" Besides, it wasn't like she couldn't _ever_ tell him who she was. She just had to wait until the start of next school year.

Her biggest obstacle was what to wear. Sophie was at a complete loss. She knew Remus would be cataloging everything he noticed about her. Indeed, it would be an insult to his intelligence if she didn't plan for it.

His postscript alluding to his costume was easy to figure out. He'd found out that _A Lady_ was in reference to Jane Austen. Sophie would bet money that he was going as either a character from one of her novels, or simply dressed in the style of the era.

In fact, she had considered doing something along the same lines. She could use the Rooms help with the dress. She would need a wig, but then what if it slipped or fell off all together? She wouldn't take that risk, even if it were very unlikely. She couldn't use a potion to change her hair simply because she didn't know one that would wear off soon enough. A polyjuice potion would take too long to make, and she didn't have the recipe. Even if she did change her hair color, what about her eyes? Grey isn't that common a color, and she was slightly taller than most girls are to start with.

"I'm too unique looking, I can't believe it." She muttered. "Well there's no help for it, I'm going to have to break the rules." She mused. Her only course of action that she could think of was to look in the restricted section. They had to have something, some book of potions. "I would even attempt a charm if worst come to worst." She muttered. If only she could just get a teachers permission. She had no business being in that particular section for any of her classes. Except—maybe potions. "Maybe Potions Master can help me."

"Do you always talk to yourself?" came the droll retort behind her. Sophie let out a startled eep and quickly gathered her scattered books from the breakfast table, carefully hiding the tome containing Remus's letter in the middle of the stack.

"Do you always make a habit of sneaking up on people, and being in places where you're not wanted?" she threw back hoping he didn't notice the slight shake to her voice. She shuddered to think how much Joseph had heard- how much he was assuming.

"At least I don't sit and mutter incoherently to myself. God, no wonder you don't have friends." He let out a short bark of a laugh. Sophie just glared while rising. She didn't like how he was towering over the back of her; made her feel even more helpless around him than she already was.

"What do you want Joseph?" she demanded.

"Oh, just to catch up with my favorite bastard child. A little birdie told me that you were talking to Remus in the library not long ago? Said he asked you to the ball. Now, what is that all about?" he stood with a relaxed stance and a friendly grin, only the hard glint to his eyes gave anything away.

"He suspects nothing okay? He asked me as a friend because he still feels guilty over the whole owl incident. I told him I was going home for the weekend so I wouldn't be there in the first place." Sophie forced herself to look him in the eyes. She hated to feel dominated.

"Well are you going back home my dear?" he asked.

"Yes." Sophie turned around gathering her books, intending to leave. A hand on her arm turning her around stopped her.

"You know Sophia. We could be good, the two of us." he brought his hand up as he talked to cup her cheek. "I've never noticed you until you made it pertinent that I do. You are such a strange creature I still can't believe I didn't see you. We could be more; I can do a lot for you. I've already tasted you once, I want more." Sophie dared not move an inch. Not because of Joseph's touch, but the sight of a sandy blonde head looking at her. Remus could see her. Oh God, he was standing up. Oh, if looks could kill she was sure her and Joseph would be dead. What was she going to do? It was bad enough that Joseph was spouting nonsense, Remus was about to make everything worse. If she could just signal him to stop or something, she could lie later, just don't make her explain in front of Joseph.

Something in her face caused him to pause in his progression to her. Her luck continued as one of his friends further detained him.

"Joseph! Stop messing with my roommate and come here." Sophie and never been so happy to hear Gwen's whiny voice in her life.

"Coming dearest!" he answered never taking his gaze off Sophie. "Think about what I've said Sophia." Sophie didn't waste any time correcting him. She ran as fast as she could from that spot.

Sophie was perturbed over the scene at breakfast, though not enough not to go through with her plan. If anything, this meant Joseph wouldn't be looking for her at the ball. She was currently waiting on the Potions Master to finish up with a student so she could try to convince him to let her have a restricted section pass.

"Ah, Potions Master?" she started as the student left. "I was wondering if you could give me a pass so I could find a book in the restricted section of the library." He looked at her confused.

"Why would you need a book from that section?" he regarded some papers on his desk, sparing her only a glance.

"Well there's this potion I want to try, but I've only heard of it in other books. I can't find the actual recipe." She stammered through. That startled him. He now looked at her intently.

"What sort of potion could you possibly be thinking of brewing that you need a restricted book?" Sophie could feel herself turning red.

"Just one that struck my fancy I guess?" inside, Sophie couldn't help but lament on how bad she was at lying.

"Well Miss Naldeg, I think you have something wrong." She swallowed—loudly. She had forgotten her and the Potions Master, precarious relationship. "I don't believe I ever hide the fact that I don't approve of your special— privileges." Sophie paled further. "I, if you remember, wanted to kick you out of potions. It was only by the headmaster's good will towards you that you stayed; that you were allowed to continue your experiments. Do not think that I now, or ever, will go out of my way to help you. I feel it best to think you don't exist. If you would do me the same courtesy then I think you will survive your last two years here. Now, kindly leave my office." He dismissed her with a wave of his hand, and returned to looking at his papers.

"But it's really important. I just need…"

"Miss Naldeg, I believe I told you…"

"Excuse me, Professor? I was wondering if you could point me in the right direction for that essay on mint plants?" Remus stopped and stared at the scene in front of him. Oh, hi Sophie. Did I interrupt something? I can come back?" Sophie plastered a smile on her face, and turned to confront Remus.

"No Remus, not at all. I was just finishing up a question I had about some homework." She shot a glance at her professor; hoping he wouldn't contradict her. "I'll just be leaving now I think." Face burning, she exited the room. She resisted the urge to pause outside of the door and collapse for a moment.

"It wouldn't take too long. I could do it. I'd just sneak in; stay a minute, sneak back out." She muttered, contemplating breaking into the restricted section.

"What wouldn't take long?" stopping, Sophie whirled around to stare at Remus.

"Ah, nn-nothing." She stuttered.

"Well Sophie, I never thought I'd see the day that a teacher didn't like you." He had a comical sort of smile on his face, dazing Sophie a bit.

"I'm not universally loved ya know? Strange as it may seem, some people don't like me." She threw behind her. She hoped he would let her leave. The warm presence at her side spoke of a different scenario.

"He looked furious with you. What did you do to him?" he asked.

"I…I'm horrible at potions, and he's just tired of helping me." She stumbled through. Sophie could only hope that he thought her embarrassed by being bad at potions. "He told me to stop coming to him for help."

"You could always come to me for help. I do still owe you for the whole owl fiasco. In fact, I insist upon it. You will now come to me and get tutoring every Friday after classes before dinner." Sophie couldn't believe her ears. If she didn't exposure herself at the ball, this new bonding opportunity certainly would cause Joseph to go over the edge.

"I couldn't possibly inconvenience you like that. I can muddle through on my own, have since first year will through the next." She assured him.

"My friends Grace and Lily will be there, so between the four of us we'll be perfect. Please come at least once? See if you like it?" Sophie made the horrible mistake of looking at him. Floppy sandy hair met warm green eyes, met that shining smile. Laced liberally with a grey parlor that reminded her of his sickly nature, resulted in the next disaster.

"All right I'll come. Not till next week though, I have stuff I need to do this Friday, in preparation for going home and all." She responded, all the while calling herself twelve sorts of idiots.

"Perfect. Now you have yet to answer my other question. Exactly where are you sneaking into?" he smiled. Sophie resisted the urge to smack herself. That double damned habit of talking to herself has finally gotten her into real trouble.

"I'm planning on sneaking into the restricted section of the library to find a book." She was acutely aware of how much she had been lying. She was in true danger of slipping up. She now needed to tell the truth as much as possible just to keep the façade up. Not to mention the fundamental part of her that _hates_ lying to Remus. "I'm just not sure how I'm going to do it…"she chattered on.

"I can help you for that. "He stated.

"No, no, NO." She cried. "I mean, you've already done so much for me, and are going to be doing so much for me. I really can't let you get in trouble for me." She softened her tone when she saw the hurt look in his eyes. When she was done, a conspiratorial smile appeared, causing her shiver in fear.

"Oh, it's going to be no trouble at all. If you remember correctly, I happen to belong to a group of notorious pranksters. We won't get caught. Meet me out front your common room at one. I'll prepare everything else. See you tonight Sophie." He called behind him as he abruptly changing directions, leaving Sophie reeling.

"Why am I doing this? There is absolutely no need for me to do this tonight. I could do this tomorrow when I didn't have some insane man hell bent on making amends with me stalking me. I still have time; I could disappear and just tell Remus I fell asleep. There's still time to leave." Sophie had not learned her lesson earlier in the day. She would argue that in such high stress situations she should be allowed to talk to herself. "Why aren't I leaving? Nothings stopping me." that was a lie; she knew it well. She could see Remus's face in her minds eye. That concerned expression threaded with disappointment. It would tear her up. "Where is he anyways? I've been hiding in this little niche for fifteen minutes now." She grumbled.

"Sophie, if we're going to be sneaking around the castle this late at night, you're going to need to stop talking to yourself." Sophie's heart found a new home in her throat. She scanned the corridor. She couldn't see anyone, yet she was positive that it was Remus's voice she heard.

"Great, now I'm hallucinating." She could hear him laughing from somewhere. Eyes darting back and forth, she still couldn't see him. "Alright, come on, show yourself already."

"Why? Its so much fun to listen to you talk." He laughed again.

"Well I'm glad one of us is enjoying themselves." She scoffed. Remus's head appeared in front of her. Sophie bit her lip trying to suppress a scream. "You jerk! That's the second heart attack you've given me tonight!" she clutched her chest, willing her heart to stop thundering. "Where's the rest of your body by the way?" it was true, his head was floating in front of her, but his body was still undistinguishable.

"It's hidden by my friend James' invisibility cloak. I know pretty darn convenient, but then again how else are we expected to pull as many pranks as we do?" He smiled, taking off the cloak to reveal the rest of his body.

"So what you're telling me is that you and your band of miscreants are cheaters? Here we are, living in awe of your masterful work, and you're nothing but cheaters!" she declared with mock disgust.

"Oh, don't sound so shocked. Besides, our so-called cheating ways are going to get you into the restricted section of the library. Now come here you need to get under this cloak too." Sophie paled. It was a long walk from her common room to the library, and she was going to be trapped under a cloak with Remus Lupin the whole way. "Come on we don't have all night Sophie." She walked forward and let the cloak be draped around them both.

Thankfully, it was large enough they didn't have to walk on top of each other. It still caused them to walk close enough that she could constantly feel the heat of him behind her. Her every nerve was on edge, both for being out so late and breaking so many rules, and from being so close to him.

They reached the library without too much incident, despite several times where she tripped and he would catch her around the waist before she face planted. The first time she tripped going down a set of stairs, he grabbed her. His arms braced her with more strength than she thought he could possess given his sickly nature. He released her as soon as she had her footing, almost as if contact with her caused him physical pain. The next two or three times, his arm seemed to linger longer and longer.

They spent a relatively short time in the library. No one patrolled the library until an hour from when they got there. He left her to her own devices once they were in. A fact that she was grateful for. She had fed him some lie saying she was looking for a charms book or something unrelated to potions. Luck was with her, she found a book describing a potion that gave you a ghost like appearance. She wasn't sure how well or in general, how it was going to work, but it was her best chance.

"Sophie!" Remus hissed. "Are you ready to go yet? The prefects are going to be here soon."

"I'm coming right now," she whispered back. She had just put the book back on the shelf when they heard the heavy double doors groan open. Sophie ran to Remus's side, he shrouded them both in the cloak again. They moved step by measured step to a corner of the room where they weren't likely to run into anyone. Remus had a hand on Sophie's shoulder the whole time.

"Did the Headmaster tell you why he's making us switch the patrol schedule?" a prefect asked another prefect from the other side of the library. A Hufflepuff prefect stood just a few yards from the couple in the corner.

"Something about students knowing the schedule and using it to break the rules." He yelled back.

"Well it seems to be clear in here, let's leave." Remus shoved Sophie towards the door. He wanted them to make it out of the doors before the prefects closed them. He hadn't planned on needing the map, opening the doors after they left meant running the risk of them still being somewhere close by. They managed to make it out before the doors closed and make it back up to the Ravensclaw common room without any more trouble.

"Thank you Remus. You know, for helping me break the rules tonight and all." Sophie stepped out from underneath the cloak. Remus materialized before her not a second later. "Though I should yell at you, I don't have a single black mark on my record, but you almost got us caught tonight." She smiled as he laughed stepping a little closer.

"Well I'm going to have to find some way to make it up to you," he said. "Or should you make it up to me since you're the one who forced me to break the rules tonight?" Little closer.

"Hey, if it wasn't for our adventure tonight, you and your gang of criminals wouldn't know that they changed the prefect patrol schedule." He smiled down at her.

"I guess you're right, I do owe you. Maybe this will help make up for it." Before she could blink, Sophie felt Remus's lips descend onto hers. They moved softly and slowly at first. It was the opposite of the forcefulness of Joseph's attack. Sophie didn't know how to respond. She wasn't experienced in this area at all. Remus's brought his hand around the back of her head deepening the kiss, increasing the pressure. Sophie responded as well she could. Remus broke the kiss soon after, his breath coming as staccato as hers.

His gaze searched her face feverishly. He did not understand what had possessed him to kiss Sophie, to keep kissing Sophie, to want to kiss Sophie again. Sophie's face wasn't giving up much, just flushed cheeks and swollen lips.

"Um, well. That was—nice." She breathed. Remus started laughing again. He hadn't laughed so much in one evening for quite sometime. There was something, just, refreshing about Sophie.

"You certainly know how to build up a mans confidence. Goodnight Sophie Naldeg." He leaned in and placed another kiss on her lips before turning and leaving. Sophie stood there for quite a few minutes before she realized something very important.

"Oh God—I'm screwed."

A/N: HA HA! Six pages BARELY! But its still six pages which means LONGEST CHAPTER EVER! And I would just like to say GO BS! In the two months since I've updated it's gotten a total of three hundred hits after the initial spike from posting a new chapter. I have no idea why. I hope for as good of results from this chapter as well! So yes I love all who read all who add and all you who review make me update faster! JA NE!

P.S. I promise the ball will be in the next chapter.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

Remus didn't bother using the cloak once he made it back into the common room. He probably looked like an idiot with the lopsided grin on his face. He couldn't stop thinking about who had put it there. What the hell had possessed him tonight? Today for that matter? Offering to break people into restricted parts of the school not really knowing what they were after. Taking liberties while under the invisibility cloak. Remus cringed a little. At first, he had been a little afraid to touch her, but he wasn't going to let her fall down the stairs. Little did he know she was going to trip so much. He suppressed a chuckle. Was she always so accident prone? Or was it just around him? Then there was the whole kissing her thing. That had not been planned at all. He still wasn't sure what had made him do that. Remus slipped into his room. Hopefully James and Sirius were still asleep.

"Why hello there Moony." Remus froze as the room lit up thanks to James' wand light.

"Whatcha got there Remus?" Sirius asked looking at the cloak over Remus' arm.

"I went out for a bit of a stroll. Hard to do this late at night without being caught if people can see you." Remus' cursed under his breath. They were not buying it. He had to suppress a groan when he saw the battered piece of parchment in Sirius's lap. They had most likely watched his every step since leaving the common room.

Sirius grinned seeing Remus' gaze. "This thing's as good as TV, I swear. Now to keep you from lying to us more, shall we recap your night? Let's see, you left at around one. Went in the direction of the Ravensclaw dorm where a one Miss Sophie Naldeg was pacing. From there the two of you travel to the library walking very close might I add." James was nodding in the background as Sirius continued his tale. "From the library where you are almost caught, you return to Ravensclaw door where you and Miss Naldeg separated then suddenly were very very close." Remus didn't try to defend himself. He was guilty of everything they were implying.

"Remus, what were you thinking?" James asked.

"I can only say I wasn't. Things have just been really crazy lately I guess." Remus winced at how lame that excuse sounded. He really had no business kissing Sophie. Sophie had never given him the slightest inkling that she wanted to be in the same room as him let alone kiss him. He had really screwed up this time. How was he going to get Sophie to stay in one place long enough for him to apologize?

"We might be a lot of things, but we don't cheat. Did you even give a thought to Gwen tonight?" Sirius asked. Remus went cold. Gwen. Not at one point had she crossed his mind. To be honest, he had probably seen more of Sophie this year than Gwen. Something had changed between them during summer. Remus felt himself mostly keeping up appearances than doing things out of real affection. He was the worst sort of cad wasn't he? "Look Remus, it's obvious that you haven't been yourself most of this year."

"Even with recent events you're still not as bad as Sirius." That earned James a glare.

"I feel horrible for all of this. I'm going to go have a talk with Gwen tomorrow. I've been meaning to have this conversation with her for a while now, I think. Sophie just…" Remus started.

"No." Sirius interrupted. Remus squelched what he was going to say next. "You are not making any decisions tonight. Wait until after that damned ball. Meet this damn mystery women of yours, get all this intrigue out of your system. Don't do anything until you're a little more like yourself. Now come on Moony, its late." The three friends settled into bed without saying another word to each other.

Waking up the next morning was difficult to say the least for Sophie. If she felt like she had slept at all during the night, she might have said she dreamed everything. At this moment, she wanted nothing more than to be asleep. Her brain had different plans. Her thoughts swirled around her, never pausing long enough for her to think anything but one thing. She screwed up. She should have never gone last night. Never should have gone with Remus last night.

Even before tonight, she felt like she was branded with a scarlet letter whenever Gwen looked at her. How was she going to face her now? Joseph and his network of spies probably already knew about it. "I bet he's plotting my down fall now." Sophie muttered. Gwen's wrath at what happened would be nothing compared to her father's apathy if not relief when he received Joseph's letter. She could see it now. Thrown from the house, burned from the family tree, ripped from her sister. Joseph coming to the overpass she would be living under and harassing her still. "I have been saving for years; maybe I'll be able to survive a summer. Finish my education." Something like this had been imminent in Sophie's mind. She hadn't been planning for it to be this soon or from this avenue.

The curtains ripped back revealing a disheveled Gwen. "Do you mind not talking to yourself so early? Some of us who care about our appearance don't need your mutterings to creep us out this early in the morning." Sophie nodded while resisting the urge to clutch her chest where the flamboyant letter should be embroidered. Gwen scoffed at Sophie's half-panicked expression before throwing the curtains back closed.

While waiting for her heartbeat to slow, Sophie thought about how unsuited for all this secret keeping she was. Her mother had let slip the big secret while her father was away on a business trip. Sophie had days to calm down enough to fake normalcy in front of her father. When she saw him next, she ended up tripping and stuttering. She was passing him in the hallway for Christ's sake! She didn't even need to talk to him. She had somehow managed to survive those interactions. That had been one person. At this point, she had lost count on who she had told what, who knew what.

Every time she talked to Remus as _A Lady_, there was this barely suppressed urge to tell him everything. It only got worse when she was talking to him as Sophie. Keeping up with the differences between Sophie and _Lady_ was becoming impossible. She was having a hard time telling who _she_ really was anymore. Sophie was acutely aware of her lack of social skills. Keeping up this many lies took social skills. There was a limit to how much she could take and she was about to go roaring past it.

"Gwen, hurry up! There's going to be nothing left at the breakfast table." One of Gwen's cronies' whined. Her complaint brought Sophie back into the present. If she was going to try to pull off this ball thing, she had a lot of work to do. The knowledge that she couldn't keep this façade up much longer left her with the conclusion that Remus and _A Lady_ were going to need to drift apart. She still was going to go to the ball. She couldn't disappoint Remus by not. She wanted her Cinderella moment too much. Real Sophie was going to need to avoid him though—despite how well he kissed.

"No Sophie, that sort of thinking will not help you." She whispered. The only way she could be with Remus—really be with him, have him know _her_—was if she was willing to risk having to fend for herself for the next two years or so…

"Maybe I _could?"_ she murmured. What she had saved away could cover tuition and enough to cover a couple of months rent maybe before she could get a job and work from there. Keeping Remus from finding out would be difficult, but not impossible. She would tell him of course, just not right away. Ease into it. Her father never liked her anyways so she was probably out of a home after graduation anyways. Remus had been nicer to her than almost anyone in her experience. He was nice to both of her. The thought of not seeing or speaking to him again made her heart twist. That was cringe worthy in its own right. Sophie was willing to take the risk. To keep knowing Remus, she was prepared to walk through fire. Hell, she was almost willing to do it just to kiss him again.

A scratching at the window caused her to jump. Throwing back the curtain, she saw Duchess glaring at her. Her heart, which had been racing, stopped. It had to be Remus, there was no way it couldn't be Remus. The question was who was he writing? Duchess screeched her annoyance at being kept waiting.

"Coming, Your Grace! I'm sorry for the delay" Sophie bowed as she opened the window. Duchess flew a few laps before landing on Sophie's outstretched arm. The owl was very careful when she landed on her servant's person. Sophie was convinced the owl actually still felt guilty about the time when Remus scared her into scratching her.

"What do you have here, my love?" Sophie cooed as the owl settled. The front did bare her name but it was not in Remus' bold, slanted script. The loopy calligraphy could only be that of her silly little sister Tessie. There were two letters from her enclosed.

_My Dearest, Darling, Delightful sister,_

_It must be a surprise to get a letter from me using this owl. I was waiting for our lazy old bag of feathers to return so I could send the other missive, when this majestic creature arrived. I just had to return my letter with her. You must tell me her name for when I go to school with you next year so I can use her too. She is so charming! (_Sophie shook her head. Thinking an owl was charming—definitely her sister.)_I'll wrap up this portion so that I don't fluster or incontinence the beauty. _

_Your favorite and only littler sister,_

_Tessie _

Sophie laughed. Her favorite sister indeed! She was the only thing that made summer bearable. Sophie and Tessie were different from their family. Sophie quiet and not really a Naldeg. Tessie a bundle of energy and singular personality. Both were not stately and refined beings that their older sisters were. Tessie had been dreaming for years to go to the same school as her older sister. Even for only one year, Tessie didn't care; she wanted to be with Sophie.

"Tessie."Sophie fell hard onto her bed. She couldn't do it. Tell Remus; get kicked out of her home. Handle what her father once he knew the truth. That was one of the scarier things. She didn't know what he would do. Keep her from Tessie, keep her from doing anything, nothing, she had no clue. If her father did nothing, what about her mother? Sophie couldn't do something that would jeopardize Tessie going to school with her, having Tessie ripped away from her. She could walk through fire for Remus; she couldn't put him in front of Tessie. A couple of months of joy he had given her just didn't stack up.

"Duchess dear, I'm going to have to be careful in how I play this." Tessie needed her more than Remus needed to know her real name. She could try to hold the façade longer. If it seemed like things were going to keep spiraling down, she was going to have to back away from Remus. Duchess eyed Sophie with a question in her steady eyes. "I'm still going to the ball, my love. We'll just be testing how good of a tightrope walker I am."

That Thursday found Sophie in her favorite room. Her disguise potion was taking a lot more of her time and effort than she had initially thought. Her delinquent streak continued as each night found her either skipping dinner to work or sneaking into the Potions Master's supply closet to get some of the more exotic ingredients necessary.

"Oh I hope this works." She lamented. The ball was tomorrow. If this didn't work, she was in trouble. Gwen, the rest of her roommates, and Joseph, had left for home already. A small miracle in Sophie's favor since she was supposedly going home too. Sophie wasn't worried about anyone noticing she was still here since all of the people that both knew her name or noticed she existed had already left.

"One or two more stirs should do it." Sophie muttered. The instructions had called for something else of course, but Sophie habits with potions couldn't be curtailed even with a potion as important as this one. The instructions said not to touch it for the last twenty-two hours of its brewing, but in similar potions, Sophie had found that extra stirs in alternating directions had helped with the duration of the potion. "These are the sorts of tricks that really show how much I play around with potions." She stated to the general air. The potion would be ready in time, which is what really mattered. She was more worried if she could pull off being her without being _her_. Even thinking about it gave her a mild headache.

Remembering the dress that The Room had provided her with made her smile. It was a marvelous creation of lace and embroidery. White vines splayed across the bodice and hem, rippling over the soft shimmering silver fabric as if they played in a gentle spring breeze. Sophie half balked when she first saw it, thinking there was no way she could wear something so eye-catching. The cut of the bodice also worried her. It was modest by today's standards—off the shoulder sleeves of delicate lace that ended before her elbows, a neckline that seemed slightly scooped that showed most of her collarbone but not much more. It was most certainly _not_ up to Victorian standards of modesty and made Sophie nervous in general. It was a beautiful dress though. She couldn't very well tell The Room 'No I don't want that one give me a different one.' when it had already done so much for her. She would be able to adjust, as long as the potion affected both the dress and her. She would be one cursed awkward looking ghost if her dress didn't appear like the rest of her. Same to, with the demi-mask and vine jewelry that accompanied the dress.

"I really wish there was some way I could thank you." She said. "You have been very kind to me over the years." Turning her mind from her ever-mounting debt, she continued her stirring. She was fascinated by how this potion was going to work. Would she seem transparent or would she be able to pass through walls? Was the reason it was in the restricted section because it stripped a person's spirit from their body effectively killing you and making you a true ghost? Should she attempt to test it before using it?

All of these questions spun in her mind still as she ladled out some of the potion twenty odd hours later. "I must be crazy for doing this." She looked at the innocent looking clear liquid. "Well, there's nothing for it. Here we go!" she grimaced before drinking. The liquid tasted like nothing, it felt like nothing. She wasn't sure she was drinking anything. After a few moments, she opened her eyes and looked down at herself. The curls that feel around her face looked as black as ever. She almost screamed when she looked at her hand. The color was slowly leaching from it, starting with her fingertips. What was left was the same sort of blue grey tinge that you saw with normal ghosts. It took a full fifteen minutes before the potion had finished with all of her. Sophie was happy to see it treated the dress just like it had her. In all honesty, it actually added more color to it.

"Well I'm about ready to go to the ball Fairy God Room. Eeep." Her voice echoed and whispered as if she was in a tunnel, distorting it to the point that you couldn't tell it was her speaking. "Well isn't that fortuitous?" she said, having fun with her new voice. Fixing her mask in place and gathering her courage, she ventured from The Room.

Given all of her extra preparations—namely the potion—Sophie might have been considered more than fashionably late. The great hall seemed a crush of humanity. Being a school of magic, the costumes where of course elaborate, magnificent, and in some cases far too much, all at the same time. The goal of the evening being to appear as different from yourself as physically possible—though the students had a slightly different idea—the great hall had been completely redesigned itself. It looked like the grand ballroom of some castle. It even had a ceiling! It quit looked like something out of Jane Austen's world. People were even waltzing and dancing as they would. Sophie had the suspicion that had more to do with an enchanted dance floor than the students own talents.

"Okay Sophie old girl, you're here now. So what do you do?" she wasn't attracting as much attention as she thought she would. The dragon composed of three different students that actually breathed fire was a little more eye catching. Most likely people thought she was one of the many ghosts out to frolic on All Hollows Eve. No one liked the sensation of walking through a ghost, so everyone who did notice her gave her a wide berth. With so many people, she wasn't sure how she was going to find Remus. He surely wasn't going to be doing the finding.

"Might as well get something to drink while I look." She muttered. Headmaster had thought of everything it seemed. Near the refreshment table was a giant fishbowl filled with annoyed merefolk. While she didn't know names, she recognized a few as students. Students, who went a little overboard with their meremaid costumes. The tank served dual purpose. It allowed the students to breathe and still attend the ball. The large sunken castle looked interesting at least. A good number of students stood laughing at their wet, incarcerated friends. Sophie couldn't. She was playing with forces she didn't fully understand, just like they did. They at least already knew the consequences of their actions—she didn't.

A flash of dark red curls caught her eye. The only person she knew with hair like that was Grace Esperons. She only knew Grace because she was an intimate friend of Remus. She would know where Remus was. At least know how to find him. That meant talking to her. Sophie was not good at talking. "Oh man up Sophie! This I you're one night. You don't have time to be concerned about awkward interactions."

"I'm sorry did you say something? I didn't quite hear."Sophie whirled around to look at Grace. Looks like it wasn't up to her now.

"Actually, I was wondering if you know Remus Lupin." Sophie tried to speak up, aware that her echoed voice could be hard to understand. Hopefully, her ghostly complexion wouldn't give away how much she was blushing right now. Grace looked closely at Sophie. No doubt trying to figure out if she was supposed to know her. Sophie braced herself and continued. "I was wondering if you could point me in his direction? I'm suppose to meet him tonight but I can't seem to find him in this crush."Sophie cursed her shyness. Her family had many large functions; she should be used to this!

Grace was oblivious to Sophie's intense discomfort. Her very pretty face lit up in realization, her green eyes sparkling. "Oh! You must be Jane!" coming forward she hugged Sophie. "I am so sorry for my forwardness." She said, stepping back and blushing. "It's just, Remus and the rest of us were very much looking forward to meeting you and were staring to get a little worried if you were going to find us."

Sophie had no idea what to do with herself. "Jane?" was all she could come up with. Grace chuckled.

"Yes. You see Remus told me about your signature and I was the one to spill your little joke. Between me and him we called you Jane since we have no other name to call you and _A Lady _ was a mouth full and a tad stuffy." Linking arms with Sophie, Grace carried them through the crowd. She only paused once when she felt the pressure from Sophie's arm catch on her own. A bold way to tell if Sophie was alive or dead. "I am sorry for my intense familiarity. They are forever scolding me for it—calling me mother and what not." Sophie ventured a guess as to who "they" were. "Remus has told me about you and I'm very excited to finally meet you myself. It was your lark name, by the way, that inspired Remus' attire and mine tonight—if he didn't tell you. I told him I would dress to match so he wouldn't be alone though truthfully I was excited at the idea. I'm an avid Jane Austen reader myself. Have you read anything by Elizabeth Gaskell? She is quite good as well. _Wives and Daughters_ is very enthralling."

Sophie would be lying if she said that she heard anything that followed. Grace kept up the chatter for both of them. If Sophie had any social skills, she would have realized how nervous Grace was too. Sophie was grateful really. She had no idea what to say. She liked this strange person. Grace's costume was Victorian. The color of red wine and elegant in cut with simple cream accents that agreed well with her hair and complexion. The tastefulness of it all made Grace look even more beautiful.

"Oh good, they're right where I left them." Sophie looked where Grace indicated. Three men stood, all in garb to match the approaching ladies.

"I thought you said you dressed as you did to keep Remus from being lonely?" at least Remus was the only blonde one of the bunch. She had enough to worry about without having to worry which one she was talking to.

Grace laughed. "I did. Sirius and James joined in to tease me. Mostly I think they couldn't come up with anything else that wouldn't get them into serious trouble. I told them they had to be on their best behavior tonight. I'm sure they feel quite put out with that dragon." She confided, stopping them just in front of the group.

"Grace, we send you for drinks and you bring us back a ghost. Are you feeling okay?" Sophie recognized Sirius Black's voice. She shrank back a bit. He had actually met her before though they had not talked at different family functions. Grace, to Sophie's eternal gratitude, pressed closer to her.

"Don't be an idiot Padfoot. You can't touch a ghost and Grace is clearly touching this one's arm. See look right there." James piped up.

"Remus, James, Sirius, I have the extreme pleasure of introducing you to Jane. She is _A Lady" Sophie_ tried to look up into Remus' eyes, but was finding it very difficult.

"Of course she's a lady Grace. Look how she's dressed." James said.

"Don't be an idiot Prongs. She's _A Lady, _Remus' pen pal, _that _lady?" Sirius and James glared at each other.

"Now behave yourselves. I swear you're just like brothers. Moreover, I'm stuck being you twos mother. Now let Remus and Jane talk." Grace left Sophie and linked arms with both grinning boys who had just finished a chorus of "Ay mother"'s

"Grace, since when did Jane get a name?" Sirius asked as Grace led them away.

"Um, Hi, Remus." Sophie said. "I, I was having some trouble finding you so when I realized who Grace was…" she stuttered. She let Remus fill in the gaps, too nervous to continue.

"I must say. When I said you could do anything to hide your identity, I didn't think you would go through this much trouble. I mean, I know you were fugitively dying to keep your secret. You didn't have to make it literal." In her current state, Sophie missed the sarcasm and jumped to apologize.

"No, it's nothing like that." She stumbled to say. "I'm not dead, I swear its, it's just a potion to give the appearance and and… I'm not dead! At least I don't think so. Grace did touch my arm and all when we walked over here. I didn't leave a body behind and I was didn't think it would do everything it has. The voice was a shock. And it wasn't meant to be an offense to you and I am sorry if it looks that way and now you're laughing at me!"Her ramblings were interrupted by that indignant cry. Remus had been just as nervous as Sophie and her contrite rant helped release some of that tension.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean it how it came out. I was just surprised is all." He smiled at her stopping anything that Sophie was going to say. "You said you were brilliant with potions but I didn't expect you to be this good. Why, if Grace hadn't been touching your arm I would still believe you were a ghost. It solved all of my questions about you. I even had you dying in a potion explosion that killed you, but left your eyebrows. Now you are the one laughing at me!" Sophie was. It seemed Remus didn't hate her yet.

They lapsed into silence. Sophie cursing her lack of small talk the whole time.

"It seems Grace has given me a name." she attempted. Regret flowed through her at the pained look on Remus' features.

"Sorry about that. I don't gossip about you to all of my friends and she is trustworthy and… There you go laughing at me again!" Remus exclaimed at being interrupted by Sophie's giggles.

"It's fine. Truly it is," she said, happy to ease him. "I like her very much and don't mind you two talking about me. Since she has already taken to calling me as such, you might as well. _A Lady_ makes me feel old anyways." Remus rewarded her with a smile.

"Then Jane you shall be until I find a better name for you." Sophie moved to stand next to him instead of in front. Their backs now towards a foreign window scene both wondering the same thing, when would that be? Having lapsed into yet another silence Sophie gazed out over the crowd. The costumes passed like a kaleidoscope across her vision. Sophie comprehended nothing. Too busy scouring her brain for some witty turn of phrase. Awkward pauses didn't seem so bad when they were in a letter!

"So are you anyone in particular from the Austen universe?" Remus asked.

"Ah, not that I was attempting. It seems I have ended up as Jane herself." The only real man from Jane's life that Remus could be had too macabre an ending for her to mention, so it was back to silence for the couple. Remus, wound up in thoughts of Sophie, couldn't realize she was in front of him. With all the twirling couples around them, out of the corner of his eye he kept thinking he saw Sophie. Which was ridiculous, she left to see her family. She wouldn't be here. What was he thinking? He was losing his mind. That was the only explanation. Nevertheless, how was he suppose to not think about her?

A/N: Oh I'm going to be evil and end it here! That's seven pages and I see no end to this episode in sight and I really want to give you people something. Ya so I can't say how sorry I am enough. See I was a senior last year in high school (never did learn grammar though) and now I'm a pre-med student in college. That equates to no life what so ever. I can barely sleep let alone do anything fun so I've really been dragging my feet on this whole writing thing. Truth be told this has been written for a while it just sat in a notebook because I've been too lazy to transfer it. I have like two more pages that will be in chapter nine written already so hopefully you'll get the end of the ball soon. Those of you who are still holding out hope that I do something with healing deep wounds. I FOUND A PLOT LINE! Yes so it's all fixed I have like four pages already re written (yes again another chapter one) but it's much better now and I have some place to go with it. So shout out to JustineXD for pming me and getting me to finally get off my lazy ass. She was very nice about it. There was one other person who pmed me also a LONG time ago and I thank you too but I have forgotten your name. So anyways see you in the next chapter sorry for the delay and I live for reviews! JaNE!


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

"Grace what are you doing?" Sirius peered at her. She had a look about her that he remembered all too well and was wary of.

"What do you mean?" Grace replied while staring off in the direction of Remus and his ghost.

"You have your scheming "I'm going to be meddling very soon" face on." Sirius smiled at the glare that earned him. At least she was paying attention to him again.

"No I'm not." She insisted, looking back over to Remus. "Oh fine, I am." She admitted before rushing to continue. "It's just Remus is awkward around people as it is and he has to be nervous that it's Jane he's standing next to." Grace chewed her lip as she stared at the tense couple. Sirius repressed a groan. Grace was going to get herself in trouble with all her meddling, and by extension him.

"Grace, it's not your problem." Sirius warned. She turned on him.

"It's partially my fault. I introduced and pushed Gwen and Remus together. Gwen has turned into a horrible person and it's my fault they're still together."

Sirius was constantly surprised by Grace's capacity to feel guilt. "What do you mean it's your fault that they're still together?" Grace's face dropped.

"Gwen's been cheating on him." She muttered, chewing on her lip. Her admission was almost too soft for Sirius to hear. "I just confirmed it the other day. But I've suspected it for a while now. I haven't wanted to say anything to Remus. They were already kind of drifting apart and it would just cause him unnecessary pain. Then he started talking to Jane. He's been having such a hard time lately."

Sirius didn't hear any of her rambling. "The hell you say. Where is she?" He started scanning the ballroom to find Gwen.

"Oh calm down Sirius. She's not here. I'll tell Remus soon. Let's not ruin tonight for him at least." Grace threw another fretful look at stoic couple.

"Think she can mess with one of my friends like that." Sirius grumbled. Distracted by his vengeful thoughts he didn't hear Grace.

"Sirius! Pay attention!" Grace waited for him to look at her before continuing. "I can't just leave Jane and Remus as they are—it's too painful. Play along, I have an idea."

Sirius narrowed his eyes. He'd learned to never blindly following Grace into one of her schemes. "What are you planning exactly?"

"Oh don't look at me like that. We're just going to get them to dance, by dancing ourselves. It'll work trust me." Tugging his arm, she led a dubious Sirius away. He wasn't sure how well this would end but the thought of dancing with Grace wasn't a bad one to be sure.

Sophie's mind was blank. She couldn't worry about anything. Her social anxiety was so paralyzing at this point she was lucky to be breathing. She kept telling herself she was being stupid. She did just fine talking when she was Sophie. The encounters always seemed to end horribly, start horribly, have something horrible happen in the middle…. "Oh stop it Sophie! If you continue like this it's going to be the end of the night!" This was not what she had been imagining when she dubbed this her Cinderella evening.

"Did you say something?" Remus asked. Sophie froze. She had said her name aloud. She was really going to screw things up tonight. She could feel it. Not trusting her mouth, she shook her head no. Remus went back to his stoic musings.

Sophie's eyes darted across the room looking for something she could make a comment about. Her eye lit upon Sirius for a moment. She turned them away from him. He was nearly as dangerous tonight as Sophie was to herself. She doubted that he would recognize her from their lives amongst their prejudice families. The possibility still was there and was wholly unpleasant. Then again, this night was turning unpleasant.

Unable to think of anything to say, Sophie returned to scanning the room. In trying to avoid Sirius she noticed Grace. They were both walking right towards her and Remus. Sophie had seen Grace a handful of times in her life, only spoken to her for the first time this evening, even so, she did not like the gleam in Grace's eye.

"Didn't we leave you two to talk?" Grace admonished when they reached the couple. Remus turned sheepish as he was reminded of his perceived failings. Sirius was grinning like a fool behind them. Grace turned her gaze on Sophie. She smiled, trying to ease Sophie a little. The poor thing looked like she was ready to dissolve into the floor from nerves. "Jane, I find myself being forward again, would you please do me a favor?" Sophie nodded. Doing anything else would take more energy than she had. "Thank you! You see, I would like to dance and Sirius is the only partner available to me. Sadly, the only way I can get him to dance would be if you would dance with Remus at the same time." Remus tried to hold back a snort. Grace was scheming again. That was painfully obvious.

"Oh, but I am a horrible dancer." The only thing that could be worse than standing in horrible awkward silence would be dancing in horrible awkward silence before she face plants.

"The ball floor is enchanted. No skill, or grace required." Grace latched on to Sophie's arm and led her towards the dance floor.

"She's up to something." Remus muttered to Sirius as they followed the girls.

"Uh huh." He agreed before stealing Grace's arm and leading her away.

"We don't have to do this if you really don't want to." Remus assured Sophie.

Sophie cringed before replying. "Actually, I'm pretty sure we have to. I have the sneaking suspicion Grace has eyes in the back of her head and will know if we don't." Remus laughed. He'd have to tell Grace. Her mock indignation would be amusing.

"Well then, My Lady." Remus offered his arm with a bow. Sophie smiled and accepted. Within moments, they were twirling around the ballroom like they had done it a thousand times. It was better than anything Sophie could hoped for. The movement rendered speech unnecessary giving her time to think without feeling as much pressure. The magic that had turned them all into Victorian debutants was completely mindless. The crush of the spinning couples meant Remus was holding her just a touch closer than necessary. It made her remember other times they were so close, and things that came of it.

Their nearness also meant Remus was kept cemented in the reality of Jane who was in front of him, not Sophie who was supposedly at home. She was just as pretty as he had imagined. Not that he had spent a lot of time imagining what she looked like. He smirked a little bit. He should have known she would be crafty enough to so thoroughly hide any telling detail about herself. Her hair was curly. The true color was impossible to guess. Right now it was a silvery color like pewter, who knew what it would change into. The shades of blue, grey, and white that she was cloaked in made nearly everything a guess. Her eyes were a sparkling grey, he wished he knew their real shade. She also had both eyebrows. Remus suppressed a grin at the thought of how fetching her eyebrows seemed to be.

"What are you giggling at Messer Remus?" Sophie shot him a mocking glare.

"Oh just at how much I like your eyebrows." He returned with a smirk. Sophie smiled.

"I doubt they are much to look at." She said.

"Ah, but you are too modest! The simple fact that they exist make them quiet lovely, but there is something about yours that make them even prettier. Maybe the fact they have lasted through who knows how many battles with potion explosions? They have a history as full as any war hero. That makes them all the more pleasing to look upon." The only thing keeping Remus from feeling the complete fool for talking so much about eyebrows was Sophie's inability to stop laughing. Remus couldn't help but join her.

"You sir, have an unusual obsession with my eyebrows. I only blow up the potions lab every once in a while! It's not _that_ shocking that they are right where they should be I think." Sophie said with a haunty sniff. The waltz reclaimed their attention and they descended into a comfortable silence. When she remembered she was just with Remus, Sophie felt a little easier about talking. The twirling made her for the most part forget about the people around her. It all felt easier with a smaller crowd.

The music came to a flourished end prompting Sophie to address Remus. "Remus? I was wondering if we could go for a walk outside or somewhere? The ballrooms a bit of a crush…." Remus smiled and nodded and led her away from the dance floor. They made there way through a terrace door that led out to the grounds. Yet another magical example of how even Hogwartz had changed itself for the evening. The doors led out close to the greenhouse and the lake.

"Well my lady, where would you like to stroll?" Remus inquired.

Surveying the landscape, Sophie weighed her choices before answering. "Lets go down by the lake. I know this one spot that is quiet nice." She set off with Remus trailing behind her. They came to a stop under a tree. Sophie loved this spot. It featured a weeping willow not too far away from the edge of the water. Its branches were long and full enough to let sunlight in but mostly conceal her. The close proximity to the water was wonderful too; Sophie loved to put her feet in on hot days not being afraid of any of the inhabitants.

"Well isn't this a pretty little spot."Remus remarked. "Do you come here often?" he asked while leaning against the trunk of the tree watching Sophie stare at the water.

"Yes." She said over her shoulder. "I find it to be one of the most perfect spots that exist" Remus couldn't see the sad smile on Sophie's face. "As you might imagine, I'm not what you would call socially apt. most of the time I feel like I'm living in this separate world from everyone else. I don't talk to them, and they don't talk to me. Which is mostly my fault and I realize that." Remus frowned a little and stepped towards Sophie—not sure what to do. "This leads me to not really liking being around a lot of people. I don't know what to do with myself. I feel suddenly thrust into a world that everyone else knows the rules to but me and the pressure to be a certain way that I don't know and I get so preoccupied with figuring that out that everyone passes by me before I get it together enough to even say hello. I'm much better if I take it in chucks. That's what's nice about this place. On nice days, I can sit here under this tree surrounded by countless people and still part of my own little world. But I'm just enough part of theirs too that I don't feel lonely." Remus hugged Sophie from behind.

"Tell me who you are. Let me in. Let me keep you from being lonely." Sophie smiled and placed her hand on his clasped around her—soaking in the moment.

"It's not that simple Remus." Taking a deep breath, she turned around and looked up at him. "More and more I think I was meant to spend most of my life by myself and sometime lonely. Don't get me wrong. I like being by myself and I do have my moments of happiness when I don't feel alone." She smiled at him seeing his incredulous look. "Reading your letters, my sister, times like tonight with Grace—she really is very lovely—they are proof I'm not alone. The moments might be few and fleeting but they are good enough for me. They have to be. At least right now. Hopefully in the future things will be different but for right now this is enough." Remus tried to battle through the intense frustration he felt without alerting Sophie. There was so much he didn't know and didn't understand that it made him want to scream. He could tell that that was not what she needed though. He might know scant little about her but he knew that.

"Oh now stop giving me that look." She playfully swatted at his shoulder and stepped out of his arms.

Remus let her and stared at her as he said, "I don't agree with everything you said. Hell I don't understand some of the things you said, but remember this Jane. You promised to one day tell me who you are, one way or another. I'm not going to let you forget that."

Sophie continued to smile and look at the water as she answered. "I do Remus. I'm looking forward to it just as much as you." Remus somehow doubted that.

Sophie and Remus stayed on the bank and talked for the rest of the night. Eventually the others found them there. They stayed even longer with the whole group until yawning was the majority of what everyone was doing. Sophie had never had such a wonderful night. She never wanted it to end because she knew what it signaled. She knew there was no way her and Remus could last. He had his friends and Gwen. She couldn't even tell him her name. Someday was a magical day that wasn't going to exist. Last night it might have, but the glaring light of dawn didn't leave as much room for hope.

Sophie spent the remainder of the short break in hiding. She probably looked like a lunatic with how paranoid she walked around the castle, but she felt justified. Shockingly avoiding Remus and his clan had been a lot simpler than she thought. Sunday night came all too quick. With Gwen and her cronies returning anytime, Sophie decided to vacate the dormitory and avoid the noise.

"I think I'll treat myself." Sophie mused. Heading to her favorite hallway, she scanned for life before she started pacing. The Room revealed itself and Sophie tried to contain a yelp of joy. The interior of the room had shifted to a steaming oasis. A large bathing pool lay in the center with everything you could ever conceive to need laid out on various vanities built into the circular walls.

"You never disappoint do you my dear?" she asked to the air. Wandering over to one of the vanities covered in all sorts of little vials. The Room never left her premade soaps but just the ingredients to make her own. It always seemed to remember her love for tinkering.

Glancing up at the mirror Sophie tried to suppress a scream, then realizing no one could hear it, let it out instead. Some of her curls had fallen out of the ponytail she had rustled them back into and one of the locks that framed her face was _not _the correct color.

"It's grey. GREY! Why is it grey?" tugging at the lock she turned it this way and that and rubbed at it hoping that it would somehow change. "It's nothing. Maybe I'm just going grey prematurely?" Sophie tried to reason. The hair did not change colors despite how much she glared at it. "Fine. I'll deal with this my way." Scanning the room, she hoped The Room knew what she wanted. Thankfully, it somehow did and she saw different bottles labeled "Hair Color" across the room. Sophie tried not to run to get to them.

This was bad. Her hair wasn't just grey, it was the grey color that Jane's hair had been. It had taken a couple of days for her hair to visibly show this grey color, who's to say it would stop where it was now? If all of her head turned grey she was going to have to answer questions she didn't want to. Using test strips of hair provided she set about making her hair color. Normally she wouldn't have taken more joy in the process. Matching a color exactly like this wasn't something she had done before and posed its own sort of challenge. Sophie's mind was much too preoccupied with worst-case scenarios to enjoy it.

Once done, Sophie took a deep breath and started spreading the dye across her head. As she coated the color across the grey strand, the color slipped off it like beads of glass on a windowpane. Letting out a cry of frustration, Sophie renewed her attack on the strand. Nothing worked.

Accepting defeat Sophie set aside the vials and slipped into the waters warm depths. She was worried what sort of questions this would raise. She was also worried that the effects wouldn't end at just her hair. She was also pissed her hair was changing colors period. She felt stupid for being vane about the color, but it was the only physical link she had to her family. All of the women except Tessie—who had inherited a color that could only come from her father—were crowned with the same smoky dark locks. It marked her as her mothers daughter when very little else did.

Sophie gasped for air as she came back to the surface. The new air burned in her lungs as she sucked it in. She welcomed the feeling. It distracted her from the spinning thoughts in her head. Floating on the top of the water, she released her straining mind. She had no will left to marshal it. She would let it do what it will and then figure out what she would do.

Walking down to breakfast that Tuesday, Sophie felt much better. Her self-pitying session hadn't last past her bath Sunday night and in the following days a course of action was decided. Her ghost streak wasn't so noticeable at the moment that if she twisted her hair right it was hidden. It was too much to hope for that the side effects of the ghost potion would stop there. She needed to know what she was dealing with. That sadly meant she had to venture back into the restricted section of the library and find the book she had gotten the recipe out of in the first place. When she had first seen it, she had stupidly not even copied down its name. Just glanced at a brief description and jotted down the steps. So many things could have gone wrong that night, she hadn't followed her normal thoroughness when it came to knowing potions before using/changing them. She couldn't count how many times already she had kicked herself for not reading more about potential reasons _why _such a book with such a potion was in the restricted section to begin with.

"Well calling yourself ten sorts of idiot hasn't help yet old girl now has it?" she muttered scowling at her toast. The fluttering of wings grabbed her attention as nerves closed a vise around her heart. She hadn't heard from Remus since before the masquerade and she was starting to get worried. All right, she was beyond worried. She had drafted countless letters to send to him but had no idea what to say. "If I don't get one today, I'll send anything tonight." She promised her pumpkin juice trying to not keep staring at the mass of feathers all around her. In her efforts to not look up, she ended up looking across the great hall right at where Remus normally sat. Scanning the tables Sophie made a shocking discovery. He wasn't there. He was _always_ there when she let herself look. Where the devil was he? She had been avoiding looking in his direction all week out of a mixture of guilt and anxiety. She felt cheated that he wasn't there when she finally gave into her urge. Grace was there. Sirius was hounding around her. James was playing with something that glinted gold. Some little rat like boy was sitting next to James. No Remus.

Bloody Hell!

Abandoning her breakfast, Sophie stalked her way to the library where she could have some relative privacy without having to go all the way back to her room. Fishing through her bag, she recovered the parchment, ink, and quill she needed. Not wanting to give away how agitated she was, Sophie took a couple of deep breathes before starting.

_Dear Remus, _

_I feel I must thank you again for what a lovely evening I had at the ball. _

As she had every other time she sat down to write this stupid letter, Sophie stalled out. They had talked about so many things the night of the ball how was there anything left to say? What else did she want to know?

"Oh just finish the damned letter Sophie! You can figure the rest out later." After glancing around to make sure no one had heard her, Sophie somehow continued.

_I'm sorry I haven't written till now. I didn't quite know what to do next. I kept waiting for your letter hoping you'd know and only just realized you might be waiting for mine at the exact same time. I'm afraid the only thing I have to say for right now is quite lame. How are you?_

_Yours boringly, _

_Jane_

_P.S. I couldn't help but notice I haven't seen you around the castle in a couple of days. Also, the last time I didn't hear from you was when you fell ill. I do hope you're feeling okay. _

Grimacing at what she decided was a horribly banal note—much too short to be called a letter—Sophie rushed to the Owlery to attach it to Duchess before she could chicken out of sending anything. She went through the rest of her classes feeling slightly better. At least there was one less thing she was avoiding. In two days, she would take care of another thing she was avoiding. Saturday night being the date she had set to break back into the library and figure out what the hell she had done to herself. "And just think! I should hear from him before that!" Sophie whispered with a smile.

"Two days. Two full days he's had that damn letter and I haven't heard a single thing from him!" even though she was beside herself with nerves, worrying that she would be caught, Sophie couldn't help but talk to herself. She could nearly be classified as Remus's stalker at this point. She watched for him at meals, in the hallways, in the library. If she had been around Gwen any other time besides when she was asleep, Sophie would be eavesdropping into her conversations for a mention of Remus. For the past day or so, she was even throwing around the possibility of writing to Grace to see if Remus was still alive. "Really, even if you don't want to talk to me anymore, you should at least write me saying so. Better than this hell of a limbo that I'm in right now." Tripping on the stairs, Sophie continued to pick her way along the dark corridors.

"It really is dark. Makes sense. Students aren't allowed out and if they use their wands to see, the prefects will have an easier time catching them. Least I have just one more tu…" before she could finish her thought, arms had encircled her with a hand over her mouth hauling her up against a firm body.

"You really don't ever stop talking to yourself do you?"

A/N: Dun dun DUN! Oh thank god I'm done. The intense writers block I've been fighting for forever has finally eased its grip over me. Ya, I'm beyond apologizing for slow updates. I do try my best. My best just sucks. But as promised! The end of the masquerade! Which was hard as hell to write. When I finally did that I then realized I didn't have a new arc ready to start. Thus more delays. Sorry for all of the time skips in this episode but I needed time to pass. Some stuff is only going to be able to happen when Remus and Sophie have history, and that cant happen without time passing really. Luckily I know where at least half of the next chapter is going so I'm going to aim for the next month or so to get another chapter out. I make no promises of course. I always break them. And I hate lying to you my most wonderful readers! Thank you to wait wait must look up name….. sapphireviolin for adding me to their update alert list! You kinda kicked me in the ass to finally finish this long overdue chapter ^.^ Well I love all of you and shamelessly plead for reviews and ill see y'all next time!

Ja Ne! (Zya Ne in some circles)


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